"If I fits, I sits. Even if It's uncomfortable"

I brought my uncles cat in to him once. Walked right past the nurses station with the kennel, didn't get a peep out of them.

The best part is that she landed in poo.

Does anyone else know that the only thing the shooter liked about President Trump is that he's a white nationalist? He went on to say in his manifesto that he despises all of President Trumps policies.

I know its a bot, but just use a damn knife.

Yeah, hate when they take the urinal right next to me when others are open.

Relax, they are making an off brand for half the price. Geez.
(please note very heavy sarcasm as most my family is diabetic)

"Finally, the recognition I deserve" - cat

yes

At least it isn't on the front.

What not to do if you got heavy leg syndrome.

Which is more likely? Everyone in class is stupid and failed, or the professor is an ass and doesn't know how to teach effectively?

Is no-one going to mention how ripped those kids are?

worst, or best?

That is the absolute clearest rainbow I've ever seen. Thank you.

Don't forget the price is right

I'm the silent guy.....sorry happy people.

Those that give nightmares to monsters.

Canadians are so peaceful dogs and cats lie down together.

Are you a wizard?