My first thought was why were they trying to touch their face to their ass before the hormones came into play?

"All right, first we're having dinner and...oh dang, we've got all the ingredients except for some cucumber. I'll have to go pick one up. Next is dessert. Ice cream? Check. Chocolate syrup? Check. Cherries? Check. Whipped cream? Oh heck. Add it to the list. Next is hot chocolate by the fire, right? We've got the firewood, good. and then... oh poop. Get the chocolate. And then of course we'll end it with some sassy numnums.... what? Ah shoot."

My favorite was the super fast laser bears.

*goes outside to see the stars behind the sun*
*stumbles back inside, blinded*

Look at his left sleeve.
Oh youuu fell so hard, you are a fool! Cena got you so good!

Idk I mean... I never use military time but I know how to tell it. Personally my reasoning is that it isn't widely used enough here that if I know I have a 430pm appointment, and I look at someones clock and it says its 1519 I gotta say shit am I late what actual time is it? and then do the conversion in my head. It doesn't take long of course, but I see it like if I asked someone how fast a thing was moving or how much of an ingredient to add and they gave me metric, I'd be like "no I didn't ask for a math problem."

She's going to restore the Dark Crystal.

I like the casual mention of not the basement or the bottom basement, but "the very, very bottom basement." He isn't allowed in either the east or west wings, nor is he allowed in the area 53 basement 34 floors below the white house where we keep the aliens, the cures to all of the diseases, the only copy of half life 4, and the best slices of bacon ever to exist. He doesn't need any more bacon.

I obviously can't speak for ALL men, but that guy is f*cking stupid.

Damn that Gale and his 2 tier bombs.

Is that Ciri?

This isn't directly related to this post and I can't remember where I heard it before, but someone was talking about a business that dealt with customers like a restaurant or retail or something and used examples like when a customer complained about poor service, the employee was reprimanded since "the customer is always right" even when the customer had a ludicrous complaint or ridiculous request. In the end they said "businesses that always put their customers ahead of their employees may succeed, but when a business puts their employees first and treats them like real people, the employees will take care of the business and help it to thrive if they actually enjoy being there." This post just reminded me of that, and I thought it was nice, that will be all.

*swirling glass and smelling*
"Ah, yes, do I detect a hint of grapes?"

I'm having issues just imagining meeting someone new and going to their house to get squishy and walking into a bedroom where the bed only touches the bottom. Honestly, it's a fear I've never legitimately had to experience.

Is she on the PS3?

The spongebob on the right always bothered me, because the original face is not laughing, it's utter shock. but sporngeboob throws on the face with the other gigglers and is there anyone else on my page or just me?

How many eyebrows?

I mean I believe that if the Infinity Stones have the power to erase and bring back half of all life in existence, they can manage to put them where the snapper expects them to be.

Yeah cool, move over!

This is one of those things that I've never even considered being a thing, until it is and suddenly I'm like "Duh, what took so long?"