If your partner absolutely, positively have to be up at eight and you don't .. get up at seven, make them breakfast and stop complaining about working people.

It's called "Reclamation" and is a very powerful strategy when used by a large enough group. By using the slurs ourselves they become ours, and can't be used against us anymore. Prominent examples are "queer" and the N-word.

Meminglessness is it's own pun-ishment.

Three man moon t-shirt.

Okay, but have you had pistachio gelato and pistachios? Those are two very different flavours.

Holy shite, imagine escaping North Korea and treating yourself to Disneyland, only to run into the Supreme Leader and his kid at the churros stand.

Yeah, people make it out like its sooo common but its only around 40 school shootings per year, with less than a hundred casualties. So what if it's the only country it happens in? American kids lives don't matter!

Arson.

Henlo, Yoshi <3

Those kids grew up.

If you can't eat something because it reminds you of dick I feel sorry for you. You are weak and your bloodline is weak, you will not survive the winter.

This is why I don't follow sports. It seems so complicated. Some dude doesn't get a haircut and now I have to have an opinion? No thanks.

Good career choice.

I used to get up a six every morning to read the news and get real good and angry to start my day, then i had coffee to relax. But that initial surge of adrenaline really got me through the day.

Renewed my library card today.

Kitteh iz innocent. Was framed by doggo!

That guy loss like he's got at least 500 years of aristocratic breeding and can barely speak without sneering.

I'm retired.

With the mouse.

His name is Robert Galbraith, not JK Rowling.