r/funny
"For five years I diligently made sure I put my hiking socks on the correct feet. Never crossed my mind that I always picked the left one first. Today I realised I had bought large socks."

Imagine going out for some fresh air, and there's homework on the railing.

So, what you're saying is that, if even Swift knows, you have to be a right idiot to vote for the old guy with dementia?

Everything they don't like is "communism". Where have I seen that before?

I miss having cats.

Looks like someone is salty about free market practices.

That just sounds like Linux with extra steps.

You're not making Christianity better, you're just making puns and ketchup worse.

That's factually a lie.
"The main finding of The Turnaway Study is that receiving an abortion does not harm the health and wellbeing of women, but in fact, being denied an abortion results in worse financial, health and family outcomes."
https://www.ansirh.org/research/ongoing/turnaway-study

The Mayonnaise Men!

CPR doesn't help against cancer.

Oh ye gods, it's managed to do everything wrong.

That's dystopian AF.

Is this that Sexual Healing I've heard so much about?

Nah, your son's already cooler than you are.

Y'all kept losing the lids and now I have to get annoyed everytime I want a pop.