Windowlicker by Aphex Twin
Actually, probably anything by Aphex Twin haha

When I was a kid my mom taught me to pick the snails out of the garden or off the driveway, and sprinkle salt on them. She would say, "See how they bubble and squirm! Isn't that funny?!" She hated those snails SO much. I always felt bad about it, but also wanted my moms approval so I'd kind of laugh and go along with it. I grew up a little and realized how f*ed up it was to do that. Then, I thought back on it as an adult like, "Damn mom, were you trying to turn me into a serial killer? Nature is not bad for doing what it does...Snails gonna snail" Lol I honestly still feel so guilty about all the snails I've killed. Now that I have kids I teach them that all creatures deserve to live their lives, no matter how small or insignificant we may think they are. I've said this many times before, but my 10yo is like Captain Planet lol He's always trying to help the little critters

Fourth row down, fourth to the right...Always haha

For a minute I thought there was a spider baked upside-down in the cake

One of my aunts bears a striking resemblance to Professor Snape lol

She looks like the old man from the old Pixar animations...the one who plays chess. And the one who fixes up Woody in Toy Story 2

I have one kink and it's a really nice collection
Hmm, sounds a little serial killer to me haha

Aw, I love elephants so much.
Fun Fact: Baby elephants suck their trunks for comfort, just like human babies suck their thumbs...So f*ing cute

Dude, I love your tree <3
I have a 10yr old, so there's like a billion decorations on my tree. But, I also have a 1yr old, so all the decorations are on the top half only. It's a wreck lol Also love the doggos...Very stylish ;^)

I had a dog who once dragged my grandmother down a hill while chasing a raccoon. Our neighbor said when the dog took off my Gma "flew through the air like Wonder Woman" Now I get her something Wonder Woman themed every year for her birthday. Her favorite has been the Wonder Woman undies lol

.....It's my son.
He puts mayo on everything, and sometimes I catch him eating spoonfuls of it

Just make sure you're talking to the right person, and not someone who's going to throw you under a bus...My husband started working at a cabinet/counter shop, and had only been working there for a few months when his boss decided to give him a substantial raise. One day, he and another worker, who had been working there for years, were talking about salaries. The other worker was pretty upset that my husband was making more than him in such a short time. My husband told him "It wouldn't hurt to ask boss man for a raise. You work well and have worked here for a while..." Blah blah blah.. The guy went to their boss and said, "Yeah, B said I should ask you for a raise." The boss denied him, then pulled my husband in and was like "Wtf?!" Then proceeded to explain why he never gave the other guy a raise. It kinda turned into a big mess x_x So yeah, maybe don't mention actually talking about salaries, and definitely don't mention who you talked with

1. My dog hates hates being in view of anyone when she poops...She always tries to find a bush or tree to go behind. When she was a puppy I would watch on her when I let her out. I guess I looked at her too long once, because she stopped mid poo, and still half squatting she waddled behind a tree lol
2. GD that baby has some glorious hair
3. That child's skill is f*ing creepy

Hey, it's Kickass ;^)

I was at a huge family gathering a couple years ago, and there was a lady there with a southern accent. She had made these delicious waffles, and I went gaga over them haha. She goes. "Aww. Well sweetie, you come to breakfast tomorrow mornin' and I'll make you a whole mess of waffles." I don't know why, but it tickled me lol It still makes me so happy when I think about it

My grandmother made masks for everyone in my family (not out of her bras), and I'm not sure what she used to measure them...if she even measured them...but they cover my whole face. She made one for my 9yo son that's a little smaller, but it's still way to big haha

Funny, my cat does the same with birds