My aunt Pat bless her heart adored butterflies.
One day while in her garden she noticed a butterfly who looked weak. It was an extremely hot day in Texas.
So thinking it needed water because it has been a drought she went inside and went to get water.
But due to the water in her well not good to drink she decided to get a water bottle from her fridge. BUT she didn’t have a cold bottle so she grabbed all she could which was a cold blue gatorade.
The butterfly was still there when she got back to it. She poured a little into the cap of the drink and placed it next to the butterfly.
It placed its little straw mouth in the drink and drank and after a few seconds it flapped its wings strong and fluttered away better than before.

OMGOD if we have another kid and it’s born out of Texas than We are SO doing this

Best kindergarten store I know is one for my youngest brother.
He came home from first day of school and my mom emptied his backpack so she could get the paper work she needed to fill out.
Inside was 3 girls phone numbers.
She said why do you have 3 girls phone numbers in your book bag?
He said because I left the other 4 in my locker
He was a cute kid but sadly he wasn’t a heart breaker girls broke his heart.

Plain was always eaten it was Fritos that was always left so I always just made us frito pie with them

If I walk into your house and this is your coffee table we are no longer friends because you can easily live with a headace

It’s telling you that it knows you are able to feed yourself but it’s obvious you need help with grooming.

Yup

When you hear your younger sibling talking shit about you

My hubby is a chubby teddy bear and I have dated skinny skeletons as well and trust me chubby hubby’s is way better.

It’s one small step for man
One giant dump for man kind

The local pool here in town does this but for only the ones in the pound.

Pfffttttt.... *explods in laughter* ha ha ha ha ha ha

The horse is like
Seriously Becky how many times did we practice this???

I said it a thousand times don’t try to remove a wasp nest dry.
You take your water hose and hose the ever loving shit out of that nest till it’s so soaked it’s pouring out water.
Wet wings can’t fly!
Than when it’s good and soaked you smash it to bits and than toss it in a bag and throw it away.

I always just pictured a Buffalo with chicken wings lol

Hay that’s the street my Father in law was born on lmfao

He doesn’t give gifts to animals only humans
So some naughty Reindeer is not his problem.
Also you don’t hear do anything when a kid is bad. He doesn’t stop them he lets things happen than just writes them down as naughty

Before you do something you think your SO would disapprove of think of it as if it was them doing it would you disapprove solely on the facts they have about your situation.
If you say you would disapprove than maybe you shouldn’t be doing it.
And if you do than look at it again and make sure it’s not just you wanting to do what you want to do. If you approve because it is nothing wrong than maybe you need to explain to them why you feel it is nothing wrong.
If they still refuse than it might be a toxic relationship

Says the person who LITERALLY built her whole city and the people in it.

My local grocery store sells rotisserie chickens that are AMAZINGLY good BUT you can’t buy them with EBT
So they sell the precooked chickens cold as well so all can enjoy.
We are not on ebt but was once.
We every once in a while get the cold ones because I can put them in the fridge and we can heat them up for a easy meal I just make the sides and throw the chicken in the oven for a few minutes and it is like it’s fresh from the store hot.

Next is o shit this retirement home is playing my jams lol