Rogaine the hair grower product for men was originally supposed to be for high blood pressure but they found that when men take it they grow hair so they rebranded it.

Future English major lol

The colored photograph brought to you by mashed potatoes

O so are you saying that over weight people should just get what they get?
That over weight people don’t have the right to have preferences in people they date?
No body wants to date someone they are not attracted to.
See over weight people can lose weight and a lot of them will come out good looking and hell some are already good looking. But being ugly takes money and a lot of magic aka make up.
Just because you jiggle when you giggle a little doesn’t mean you are as ugly as the east end of a west bound horse.
It just means you have more cushion for the pushin.
Also you be surprised at how many gangly ugly guys date over weight girls purely because they don’t judge a person by thief body they judge people by a person’s soul and actions. So her talking about giving the ugly boy a chance is her saying you know what he seems nice and though not a looker I bet he treat me right.
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Sorry for the rant I am just tired of this shit.

It’s an emergency because
1. He could of been just almost dead. See when someone is dead it is hard to be 100% sure they are dead with out proper equipment which planes don’t have. So he could just been in a coma.
2. Have you any idea what happens to the human body after it dies? It vomits if not sitting up right and it pisses and shits it’s self. Yeah you will piss and shit your self than when you will vomit on yourself. See all the muscles that hold all your bodily fluids will relax and it is like someone open the flood gates.
3. They also pass gas and I don’t mean dear god who beefed? I mean HOLY HELL WHAT COW ATE A FAMILY OF SKUNKS THAN SHIT OUT THE REMAINS ON THE CARPET!!!
4. You can any or all the illnesses that man had or died from. The human body is a toxic dump.
5. Planes cant store a dead person for long they don’t have a fridge big enough so it don’t rot.
Trust me you want them to land. Plus DUDE chances are he had family with him on the plane!

Things I will be doing for my grandkids lmfao

I am saving this for future arguments lmfao

Ok so all these are true stories EXCEPT the one about Gordon Ramsay lookalike little person that is completely made up by one those trash rags that write about stuff like aliens made me pregnant and Bat Baby.

Been over this there is regulations to how much and what type of make up can be used.
And some pageants don’t allow make up. Only natural beauty.

We used to tell our kid that she was the bad guys and she was attacking us in the game.
When ever she play against my husband and he lose to the bad guy she say YEAH GOT YOU!!! I killed you I win!!!
lol

When my kid was about 8 my Dad passed away. I explained to her about him passing away. Saying how he went to heaven and he be happy and no longer hurt.
She started asking questions about what can you do in heaven.
Like: Do you eat?
I said well you don’t have your body anymore so you don’t need to eat but people like to eat so you probably get to eat what ever you want and never get sick. She suffers from a stomach issue from birth so this was a big bonus to hear that.
She asked
Do we sleep?
I said again we won’t have our bodies so we don’t need sleep but people like to sleep so we probably get to and always wake well rested with vivid dreams. She loves to sleep and take naps so she likes that as well.
She also asked and this is my favorite one lol
Do we poop?
0.o <—- my face
Well like I said we won’t have our bodies so we don’t need to poop. But I guess if you like to poop than you get to. Maybe each poop makes you feel lighter and you don’t have diarrhea or constipation.

It was a cork pop gun it went pop and the CORK was attached by a string.
That be like trying to attack a burglar with a bang snap!

My grandmother threw me for a curve she wasn’t racist she believed all being equal.
BUT she told me she hoped I would marry a white person.
I asked why she said because the children would be half white and half other. It would be hard for them trying to find where they fit in this world. Not truly accepted by one or the other.
She didn’t care if I married a different race she cared if my kids didn’t feel like they belonged. She didn’t want them to feel alone.

Seriously my brother who been married and divorced had 1 kid hidden from him yet he did know about him just did nothing about it had 3 other kids oldest kid had been married 3 times by time she was 20 and has 2 kids different dads, he been arrested 3 times due to fights had more jobs than I can count though he is 47 and now lives with a woman nearly twice his age, HAD THE BALLS TO SAY TO ME THAT HE IS THE ONLY ONE WITH HIS LIFE IN ORDER!!!
Lmfao all because he can afford 2 cars and a house that his gf owned before meeting him.
I who been married only one time for 15 yrs 10 yrs longer than ANY OF MY BROTHERS!!! With my 1 kid WHO I HAD PLANNED FOR AND HAD AFTER BEING MARRIED FOR A YR AND HALF!
But just because when shit hit the world fan I asked my aunt for help 3 times (yes I know three is a lot but shit SERIOUSLY HIT FAN FOR A YEAR PLUS!) I am a failure. -.- seriously! My other brothers either don’t have a job AT ALL, is a drug addict, or is an asshole who should NEVER HAVE KIDS!

Legit everyday I send my husband to work with a love packed lunch and he comes back with lunch untouched I KNOW HE ATE DRIVE THRU WITH OUT ME!!!!

I just got this look (-.-) from my kid lmfao
My husband doesn’t tell Dad jokes I do. My kid just said MOM they are called DAD jokes for a reason! You need to tell Mom jokes. I said ok fine Your Momma is so clever that she tells better Dad jokes than your Dad!
I got a UGH!!!! lmfao

Fuck yeah only way I see this getting better is if you got a fort as well!

(0.0)
Ummm...
(0.o )
( o.0)
Nooooooo.... I don’t read... I just...
I SWEAR ITS JUST FOR THE STORY LINE!!!!
I’M ACE SO IT DOESN’T COUNT!!!
*runs away to delete history*
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Jk jk lmfao *wipes away tear from laughing*

Can I just say as a dyslexic person it REALLY pisses me off that more than one moose is not called mooses or even better meeses!

That’s how awesome Mike Myers is.
He wrote that movie and so he added that line in himself.
He wrote about a sex crazed pervert of a guy who had limits and knew how to treat women right.
He knew when a dirty joke would be funny and when told to stop he did.
Austin Powers was ahead of his time so it was a good thing he went to the future. lol
Honestly that line is why to this day I still love Mike Myers and his movies.