Currently 1.09am and the neighbours cockerel (couple of open fields between us) is doing his thing, the noisy sod.

I'm sure the plastic surgery had nothing to do with it.

No, I'm Penis Man.

It's rear wheel drive with a high central tunnel. Looking at him he's probably worried that he might be a little erm... rotund.

The difference is Andy Kaufman was a comic genius. I struggle to get past your second post of blah blah blah without falling asleep.

Excuse me. British, not Europe. (Just kidding by the way)

@aphelion. You are missing two of the most important reasons these animals deserve to be cared for. 1) They are living beings that hurt no-one. 2) They probably bring more joy to people than you ever could. In fact there's another , 3) they may not have much of an existence but they don't waste their lives bitching about different species and trying spread hate unlike you. And for that reason I'd rather see a million koala's live than one of you. You miserable tosser.

Here in the UK it's Father Christmas, Santa’s Grotto, Reindeerland, XM4 5HQ and yes, you get a letter back.

Probably the wisest words I shall read today.

Jesus you like to write a lot. Here's are my tips for getting served in a bar. Wait your turn. When you get served order what the hell you want, you're a paying customer after all. If you think the bar tender is bypassing you it's because you're a dick, or they are. Either way do yourself and them a favour and find somewhere else to drink because you won't get any joy in that place. Tad talk over.

tldr