Yep, I put some clothes in a pillowcase and ran away but didn't get far as I wasn't allowed to cross the road on my own. My mum bribed me to come back with an apple. An apple FFS!

Show me the fucker that clipped the dogs ears. Who the fuck does that?

She can shout 'til she's blue in the face. Love is love. Either she'll move on when the time is right or she won't. It's not something that can be forced, at least not by someone stood outside looking in.

What has not showing lips got to do with Britishness? It's not something I've heard of before.

Dawn French in The Vicar of Dibley.

The fanny is on the front in my country.

Trump isn't the only one with a huge arsenal of nukes. I'm not sure the likes of Putin would lose any sleep if he had to do kill someone to get to the launch codes.

She needs to do something with her hair. Her roots are showing.

It's not the size of the dog in the fight.

We used to have windows like this. When the internal mechanics go wrong it's a nightmare to fix and they used to go wrong often. Ended up replacing them for ordinary side opening windows.

It's not just about buildings. If they hadn't "won" the war what would life have been like for the inhabitants? For example, I'm sure life in most countries would have been worse if Hitler had won. War isn't good, ever, but sometimes you have to fight. The alternative doesn't bear thinking about.

But a problem shared...

If I was poor I would wear a cheap watch but if i was rich I'd wear a more expensive one. As long as buying the more expensive watch doesn't make me poor then I don't see a problem with spending more. Life is for living. No sense it hoarding all that money. You can't take it with you when you're dead.

Kookaburra lives in the old gum tree. Merry merry king of the bush is he. Laugh kookaburra, laugh kookaburra, how gay your life must be. I wonder how many of you sung that as you read it.

Is there a flag for straight people? Serious question.

Sod his passport he should be arrested for not looking like a human.

There already is a sequel to The Fly.

Damn that's a bad day. I wouldn't be happy about not having the banana either. Still things can only get better from there right?

Nope from me. She's took everything from me and it still wasn't enough.

If I get a choice of the expedited Thursday delivery or the ordinary Friday - Wednesday delivery I'll always go for the latter and 9 times out of 10 Amazon will deliver it on the Thursday anyway.

Because good memories are priceless.

£3.50 for a bowl of cereal. Bugger that.