A towel monster ate some bad glasses and got a tummy ache and took a shit on your bed

Seriously the only thing I notice every time these show up is that the chick from ratatouile looks like a dude

I like your shoelaces

They'd find a way to kick captain Jack sparrow out because of his smell

Are Natasha and Clint in the cab?

It's going to pop

Wow this is old school

Hunting in skinny jeans and converse

Are you telling me he ripped out his own spine like subzero, regrew them, and repeated the process multiple times?

Why'd you give us an example of black Jesus

Folk metal? Like a rally hardcore Jimmy crack corn?

I was thinking diarrhea

How else are you suppose to pose with it?

No one give us that "E-cigarettes aren't harmful" crap

One step closer to becoming the winter soldier

They're not going to live long enough to get into the rebellious stage

I want a paint that makes it look like it's from borderlands

Unfortunately you can't do that in boot camp

It's called "being Mexican"

Your arm is going to turn green

That's exactly what I imagine people with that kind of job would look like

Kitty titty