All is fair in love and war, and I'm pretty sure a heated Monopoly game can be considered war.

Zootopia, anyone? When Mrs Otterton was interviewed because she lost her husband? I'm pretty sure she was also wearing a scarf.

They were totally asking for it, though. I mean, they were about as subtle as a hand grenade.

@grimreaper
When I was a kid, I used to worship dolphins and pray to them. I literally thought dolphins were God.
... And now I have many regrets.

It's great and all, but once I get in there, I won't want to come out or I'll get so lost in a book that I'll just kind of forget how long I've been in the toilet for.

Dude, okay, I can never draw an even and good looking love heart no matter how hard I try. The fact that he can draw a love heart with his left hand without making it look like a meatloaf is impressive!

At first, I thought it meant 'shot' as in a gunshot.
But oooohhh. I get it now.

Okay, so when I saw the word 'doll', I imagined it to be the size of a barbie doll and that just conjured weird images in my head.

The sad thing is that I have nothing to hide on my phone but I still start sweating like a hooker in church.

Well, you obviously didn't hang up quick enough then.

Now imagine sticking that to the back.

My friends put pepper in my hot chocolate once, and of course I could taste it, but I just swallowed it and pretended it tasted even better than usual. Later on, I caught them trying to tear to see whether it actually made it taste better or not. They were not impressed.