satans_mistress

satans_mistress


I used to be Twisted_Soul. I don't have a complete soul, good luck trying to kill me.

— satans_mistress Report User
This concerns me 76 comments
satans_mistress · 9 years ago
Oh fuck.
I meant bladder!!!!!
Goddamn how did I graduate high school?
2 · Edited 9 years ago
Pls stop 15 comments
satans_mistress · 9 years ago
[Of our and all time]
3rd fave phrase
This concerns me 76 comments
satans_mistress · 9 years ago
I don't know. I just laughed really hard.
I have the latter of a kitten also.
Don't judge me.
2
This concerns me 76 comments
satans_mistress · 9 years ago
#yourenotalone #youhavetheinternet
1
This concerns me 76 comments
satans_mistress · 9 years ago
I don't think you'll ever know how hard I laughed at that.
Almost pissed myself
2
Hard up the toenail! 27 comments
satans_mistress · 9 years ago
Yay puppy!!!
1
deg deg 19 comments
satans_mistress · 9 years ago
I KNOW RIGHT
YOURE MOST WELCOME
2
I'm not judging 6 comments
satans_mistress · 9 years ago
I wonder if a fall from this height is enough to kill me.
7
*noots internally* 7 comments
satans_mistress · 9 years ago
[NOOTS INTERNALLY]
I found my new favorite phrase.
17
deg deg 19 comments
satans_mistress · 9 years ago
Ugh YES meow, like it's more of the creeper face your friend does????? You know like when you're messing around and your friend does the whole creeper look/smile/sound and you do it back at them????
3
deg deg 19 comments
satans_mistress · 9 years ago
Same. What I did was copy and paste it on my notes or memo pad and when I Need to use it I just copy and past it and there you go.
( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°)
5 · Edited 9 years ago
This concerns me 76 comments
satans_mistress · 9 years ago
I know right!!!
1
This concerns me 76 comments
satans_mistress · 9 years ago
There's this comedian (Ross I think) who wad talking about a friend who had a new boyfriend and he asked her how the guy was and she said
"Well he's kind of a Harry Potter fan in bed."
Ross:"What does you mean?"
Friend: "well when he was about to climax he yelled 'EXPELLIARMUS'"
Ross: "oh my god and what did you do?"
Friend: "I just went with it Ross and yelled back 'FIVE POINTS TO GRYFFINDOR'"
7
This concerns me 76 comments
satans_mistress · 9 years ago
Can't wait to try it
3
I struggled with this for years 11 comments
satans_mistress · 9 years ago
OHMYGJO YESS HOLY SHIT
I FUCKING CANT BREATH
GSJJD FUCK SEND HELP
2
Hard up the toenail! 27 comments
satans_mistress · 9 years ago
Yeah she is. But she's also saying that it doesn't matter cuz she loves him so much. She would give up her own name to be with him:
"Deny thy father
and refuse thy name;
Or if thou wilt not,
be but sworn my love
And I'll no longer be a Capulet."
3
deg deg 19 comments
satans_mistress · 9 years ago
I always though it was like "yeeeaaaaahhhhhhhh" but all creepy like, ya feel?
3 · Edited 9 years ago
Rats are trained to sniff out landmines 14 comments
satans_mistress · 9 years ago
Ok look dont judge. I also have a crippling fear of heights but I have no problem watching a surgery while eating spaghetti. I'm weird .
2 · Edited 9 years ago
Hard up the toenail! 27 comments
satans_mistress · 9 years ago
Naw I think you're right. She says "tis but thy name that is my enemy". And she goes on saying that all a name is is a name and even if you change the name it's still the same thing:
"What's in a name?
That which we call a rose
By any other word
would smell as sweet;
So Romeo would,
were he not Romeo call'd,
Retain that dear perfection
which he owes".
4 · Edited 9 years ago
Hard up the toenail! 27 comments
satans_mistress · 9 years ago
I'm sorry. Please accept this ice cream sundae with Oreo bits.
3
deg deg 19 comments
satans_mistress · 9 years ago
Im calling it a deg deg
20
Hard up the toenail! 27 comments
satans_mistress · 9 years ago
No one asked your opinion
1 · Edited 9 years ago
giraffes & crystal meth 16 comments
satans_mistress · 9 years ago
1. Huh...cool. kinda like it, mind if I use it?
2. Awesome. Do you also sell edibles?
2
I'm posting this today because of the time zones 32 comments
satans_mistress · 9 years ago
That's beautiful
1
I'm posting this today because of the time zones 32 comments
satans_mistress · 9 years ago
Yeah you do
( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°)
1