Smitty

smitty


I am just a very thin layer of charming with some funny sprinkles wrapped around a huge creamy center of raging arrogant a-hole.

— Smitty Report User
I guess so 8 comments
smitty · 6 years ago
Maybe, but when I ask a question, I expect an answer. Not verbal tapdancing.
"f*ck asimov” 4 comments
smitty · 6 years ago
Nope, not that. Military EOD robots have been equipped with shotguns and belt fed machine guns for over ten years now.
9
I guess so 8 comments
smitty · 6 years ago
I went out to McD's a couple nights ago expressly for the purpose of getting fries and ice cream.
The fucking machine was broken at not just one, but two damned locations. TWO.

The A-Hole at number two really pissed me off. I pulled up to the window and asked;
"Is your ice cream machine working right now?"
"Uhh, it kinda exploded."
(WTF is that supposed to mean I wonder.)
"Can I still get some?"
"Uhh, I have it all over me."
(You still aren't answering the question asshole.)
"Can you serve me ice cream right now or not?"
"Uhh, no. It's broken."
(Thank God, a straight fucking answer.)
"I'll try some other time. Thanks." I retorted as I pulled away.
"Sorry, have a nice..." his voice diminished behind me as I pulled away. Any more pissed and I might have flipped him off as drove away.
The most complete mammoth head ever found 4 comments
smitty · 7 years ago
Guy on the left looks like he's thinking,
"Damn it Bob, I told you not to bring that inside."
4
Grandma can ride me 4 comments
smitty · 7 years ago
Old people still kicking it.
6
Father's amazing face swap with his baby 2 comments
smitty · 7 years ago
They look like college buddies, programmers launching a tech start up.
1
Nothing happens 4 comments
smitty · 7 years ago
With a sleeping disorder, it's easy. Really easy, like frighteningly so.
6
Update on Voyager one as it has Pluto in its rear-view mirror 9 comments
smitty · 7 years ago
https://youtu.be/jaJ-xDLB_C8

Consiter again, that Pale Blue Dot.
That's here, that's home...

...that's us.
4
How confrontation in a college dorm is handled 3 comments
smitty · 7 years ago
As a resident of that dorm, I'd have reported that accusation to the facilities management.

Just like it's the cleaning staff's responsibility to report the mess to facilities after cleaning it up, NOT make accusations of any kind, founded or not.
7
Our ancestors were amazing! 16 comments
smitty · 7 years ago
@guest, you could have read my post that answered that question six months ago.
but then again, you are necroposting on a six month old post...
3
"Golden hands" Snow cleaning machine 7 comments
smitty · 7 years ago
The "OMG, I FUCKIN' LOVE COCAINE!" spider?
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Santa is real 8 comments
smitty · 7 years ago
Yup, getting in and out without being seen? Seems legit.
18
Pray for my girl 5 comments
smitty · 7 years ago
Satirical? I sure hope so.

Because infidelity is one hell of a high-fuckinglarious joke, let me tell you.
9
You know what 11 comments
smitty · 7 years ago
Must be a vegan health nut post.
I mean really, they're a lot of the same nutters that think that milking cows 'murders' them and sheering sheep skins them alive.

Were you expecting logic and sense?
2 · Edited 7 years ago
Citrus golem 9 comments
smitty · 7 years ago
I'm not sure what word among dangerous, unconstitutional or incompetent Mr. Clement
was going for, but he sure as hell missspelled the fuck out of them.
2
Apple, rehashing old tech as their new invention since 2017 8 comments
smitty · 7 years ago
*Apple, rehashing old and stolen technology since forever.
15
Hit the AV button on the remote 50 comments
smitty · 7 years ago
To be fair, in those four I'm counting NBC, ABC, CBS and PBS. On UHF there were two, one was good for hockey, the Three Stooges and a hosted movie program at 8pm weeknights. The other, afternoon cartoons and Atomic Monster Theater on the weekends.
Hit the AV button on the remote 50 comments
smitty · 7 years ago
Four good VHF channels and a couple ok ones on UHF.
1
Mastermind 10 comments
smitty · 7 years ago
Both. I'm going with both.
Now this is real art 10 comments
smitty · 7 years ago
Maybe you just haven't found that thing yet.
Give it time.
1
Isolated tribe sees white man for the first time 7 comments
smitty · 7 years ago
It's cute actually. She seems to be expressing a genuine curiosity. Not just the skin tone, but the body hair too.
38
Fml comp 15 comments
smitty · 7 years ago
If taking exception to the waste of freedom by the bigoted, ignorant and close minded; standing up for what I believe and for the woman I love is self righteous, well...

You're goddamned right.
4 · Edited 7 years ago
The UK is in it for the long haul 23 comments
smitty · 7 years ago
What? I was talking about the monarch and the president announcing that they were getting married at the end of their press conference, downplaying it by preceding it with the colonization announcement.
One way to stop people from cheating 11 comments
smitty · 7 years ago
Terms of service and parents being responsible for their children's actions. Pleading ignorance to their activities online is not a defense.
2
The UK is in it for the long haul 23 comments
smitty · 7 years ago
Probably. It would be facinating to see how it all shook out.

Interesting enough that it is something I've written about in the history of my science fiction world. A single president and a single monarch meet at an official state function of some fashion. They hit it off and in a big way. They soon begin hosting each other at Camp David and Windsor Castle on their vacations.

Both political pundits and tabloid rumor mill kick into high gear... marrage, UK/US unification, the whole lot.

At a joint conference, they announce a joint colonization initiative with the intent being the birth of a new and eventually independent nation: the United Kingdom and States Alliance, UKASA. A nation loyal to the Constitution and recognises the authority of the Crown.

And oh yeah, we're getting married too.
· Edited 7 years ago