You shouldn't hold onto every thing

wow so deep

Wait! Phil! Don't let go of the ro- aaaaaahhhhhhh!!!!!!!!! *screaming fades into silence*

Unless, you know, you're gonna fall into a gorge deeper than hell.

That's why I never ask someone I'm talking to on the phone if they can wait. I just hang up.

"I'm sorry mom, but we are going to have to take you off the ventilator"
Mom: but son why? I will be fully recovered in 2 weeks?!
"Because a post on the Internet said to"
*breaks down sobbing*