This is the best

"See babe this could be us but you keep calling the cops"

Hm
Well
How very
Uh, quite
Yes

Aw! That's so cute.

Brilliant!

I read the "Oh hi girl who's making out with my son" in Tina Belcher's voice

Do you guys need anything? Snacks? Pizza? A condom?
- jk it's such a sweet story