That could actually qualify as sexual harassment depending on your workplace rules. She's making up stories that are, vaguely, of a sexual nature, you've overheard, you're obviously upset/uncomfortable. Report it to a supervisor or human resources ASAP, she's smearing your character to coworkers.
alternatively, as soon as you see her, scream 'liar liar pants on fire' at the top of your lungs and point at the lying bitch...with a torch. proceed to demand an apology. if she refuses, threathen to literarly light her pants on fire.
sorry. i'm bad at advice. :B
I liked where you were going with the flaming torch though. I mean.. If that doesn't work you can gather a mob of local villagers, armed with torches and pitchforks, storm your place of work and demand she be tried as a witch. Worst case scenario, she's not a witch and dies in the testing after her trial, best case scenario she is found a witch and is executed for what she has done to the village-- I've taken this slightly too far again, haven't I?
Do like I suggested on something similar:
Document all of it, everything said, when and to whom and report it to your supervisor.
Start looking for a new/better job in the event that you are laughed off... which sadly is likely.
.
Escalate as needed to HR cc your supervisor.
Escalate to HR, cc your supervisor and her supervisor.
.
If all else fails and you are ready to take that better job at your company's competition for twice what you make now: email HR and cc her, your supervisor, her supervisor, the CEO, the board of directors, the DOL and all of the major news outlets, both local and national.
Mention in the body of the letter a strongly worded comment about hostile work environments and taking sexualy harassment of men seriously.
@ecumenicalmatter we better shut up and let the people with non-torchy advice do the job (but i'm totally in if some witch-burning is going to happen *grabs red gown of the spanish inquisition*)
Perfect, they'll never expect us! If it's handy I've also got some other weapons at my disposal apart from torches, such as surprise, fear and ruthless efficiency
sorry. i'm bad at advice. :B
Document all of it, everything said, when and to whom and report it to your supervisor.
Start looking for a new/better job in the event that you are laughed off... which sadly is likely.
.
Escalate as needed to HR cc your supervisor.
Escalate to HR, cc your supervisor and her supervisor.
.
If all else fails and you are ready to take that better job at your company's competition for twice what you make now: email HR and cc her, your supervisor, her supervisor, the CEO, the board of directors, the DOL and all of the major news outlets, both local and national.
Mention in the body of the letter a strongly worded comment about hostile work environments and taking sexualy harassment of men seriously.