If I don't shave my chest everyday, then I start looking like a fucking ape. Not to mention I'm at the awkward age where I can grow stubble in a few hours, but only a neckbeard. Fucking sucks.
Nah, I have long hair so I need to use conditioner too. I don't have hair. I have a fucking mane that starts at the top of my head and requires bobby pins and blow drying to keep under my command.
Just use shampoo?