Smart

A cold soda will get him to move faster than he'd care to.

Just drag him away. Or do as @leincredibleme suggested.

Curb stomp the asshole.

This can’t be real, can it?

At that particular point I would either piss on him, call law enforcement and get him a room for a while (extortion, trespassing, and so on) or find an alternate route. Most likely go with option 2 though.

This happens in cities alllllllll the time.

I wonder if any of the "piss on him" or "stomp his throat" or even "spray him with a soda" people are the same ones that "liked" the post/meme about how terrible it is to have spikes in the ground to prevent the homeless from sleeping in front of businesses. But, it's a little different when you're the one being harassed or inconvenienced.

Stomp on his throat