Once I helped this old guy carry some stuff to his car, and when he said thanks I short circuited and said "no, thank YOU" before walking away and I still think about that a lot
I was at a store and after paying for my stuff when the cashier said thank you, i, instead of saying no, thank YOU, said "it's okay". I still go to that store regularly and die a little every time i remember.
I just remembered, one time i was at gardaland and when going on a ride you have the option of paying a few euros to skip the line so you dont have to wait 20 minutes. I went up to the guy selling tickets and as english is not my mother tongue something got lost in translation and i ended up asking a ticket for the "speed entrance" - easily one of my most facepalm worthy moments
Once I held the door open for someone, and when they said thanks, my brain was thinking "you're welcome!" and "no problem" at the same time, so I said "No welcome!"
Once I was late to class and my friend pointed that out to me so I went to say either "shut up" or "fuck you" and ended up saying "shut you" to which he laughed at.
Once I was handed my food by a waiter and after he told me to enjoy my meal I started to reply "Thanks, you too" and my brain was like "abort abort, just say thanks" but I was already halfway through so I actually said "Thanks yanks" and we just stared at each other
lmaooo