I call dibs

I'm no philosopher but I have suspicions this might be uh, turning people away

Who wants to take a drink next to a dude’s hog anyway?

https://i.imgflip.com/jsxjm.jpg

That's not a water fountain. It's the wang washer..the ball bather...the penis pool...the dick dunk..the cock cleaner..

That's a bad place to go down with an open mouth.

The white pipe under the drinking fountain is actually a drainpipe.