Frozen river of chocolate from a factory leak in WestöNnen, Germany

"frozen river of chocolate" I'm gonna stop you right there, buddy. That's all I need to know.

*shifts eyes back and forth, then slowly bends down and breaks off a piece, then runs like hell*

Try falling in this one Augustus!

Seems like bots are having problems when there's an umlaut. It's Westönnen, Germany.

come with me.

Is that police guarding the chocolate river, because if so, they ABSOLUTELY have their priorities straight.