This will improve productivity by 1000%

i mean depending on the programmer it might just be a distraction for a variety of reasons. Could be hard to focus when someone is doing stuff around you like touching you are speaking at you. Could be that they cant hardly think about the programming because they have no blood in their brain as it has all quickly moved to their crotch.

I bet that's not all they do

I hope there is a male cheerleader for every female programmer.

...cosplay hookers? That's one route, I guess.