Totally

Both methods have strengths and weaknesses as well as philosophical differences. But yes, it does suck that because as a child your parents didn’t force you to save all your money, invest, work odd jobs etc; or because you didn’t want to or know to that you don’t have a huge savings account at 18. It sucks that because you spent all that time mastering video games or reading for fun that you aren’t a math whiz or a science genius or musical prodigy or accomplished athlete.

But.... there isn’t really another way to do things that we know of. The circumstances of your life are going to unequal and random. You don’t choose how rich or loving or intelligent or talented your parents are, wether you have genes or tendencies for diseases, cancer, baldness, deformity. The random genes that made you might make you fit and good looking or you may look and feel objectively poor. You get no say. You can’t choose to be born into a family with connections or power or wealth etc. what country or time period you are born, you show up and get what you get- and all those things will impact your success and opportunities and challenges in life.

You do your best, every moment of every day. The best you can at that time and that place, the best you know how. If you could go do something from the past with knowledge and experience from the future then your best might have turned out better. You can’t.

So a random cosmic dice roll could already have made it all but impossible to achieve XYZ goal by a certain age or be at a certain status in life by a certain age. But you look back and say “if I’d have done XYZ 10 years ago, I’d be where I want right now...” Well- if you do nothing now you likely won’t be there in 10 years either.

We are always learning in life (if we want to be better and have things be better.) Some people are “smarter” or “better looking” or naturally more organized, more talented at certain things, taller, whatever. That’s life. It sucks but it’s what it is. Some people are more mature or responsible at younger ages. If you weren’t- you just have to start now that you know better. Part of being mature is realizing that some dreams die. That’s ok. As you age and mature you make new dreams and the thing you once would have wanted most in the world- you might not want anymore.

You WILL NOT become a Navy Seal or Air Force fighter pilot at 55 with no previous service history. You won’t. If you haven’t done what needed done by then that dream is dead. If you’re 28 with no education a shit job, no credit, and no one to get a personal loan or co-sign from and broke- but dreaming of a house by 30 in an affluent suburb- unless you win the lotto or something it isn’t happening. That dream is dead.

You can hold on to the corpse and let it drag you down or you can move on. That’s maturity. Fixing your credit, working twice as hard as you would have had to before, advancing your career and gaining the skills, connections, skills, education etc to get a good career for yourself, and owning a house at 40+. That is the new dream. That’s maturity. The effort and time you waste on “coulda woulda shoulda” and fantasy- is time and effort that could be used to get where you want to be. Life doesn’t have a schedule. You can do “everything right” from kindergarten and still miss your goal. You can fail, you can get sick, have a break down mentally, an accident, do one dumb thing or be in the wrong place at the wrong time and be knocked off your plan. Your plan means shit to life. It has its own plans.

You’ve gotta roll with the punches. Play the hand you’re dealt and play it as well as you possibly can. The cards are random, there’s nothing you can do about past bets you’ve lost. You’ve got the chips you have, the hand you’re holding, your wits, and anything you can find to use to your advantage. That’s it.