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fluffydress
· 4 years ago
· FIRST
Fantasize about one girl only ok
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deleted
· 4 years ago
That makes it worse
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fluffydress
· 4 years ago
:(
guest_
· 4 years ago
That’s a rough place to be. We all get lonely sometimes, but for some folks that loneliness can last a long time. If it’s coupled with depression, codependency, idolization etc- work on those, preferably with a professionals care and guidance. In the meantime, ask yourself if the only thing you want in your life is a woman- chances are you may want more, a home to share, security or freedom to spend time with her... work on getting yourself those things while you are at it. Between those two things and time- chances are that you’ll end up not so lonely after awhile. Until then- hang in. It’s tough, but so is an Olympic event, and if you don’t go through those tough patches you probably won’t end up with a good let alone a bronze to show for it. “Train” for the goal- get your mind and body right. Push to the goal- out a solid effort in to everything you do and be ready to feel pain and get tired but keep going. End up where your efforts led and congratulate yourself on giving your all.
guest_
· 4 years ago
As for fantasy- am old boss said to daydream on your own time, when there’s work to be done, keep your head on what you are doing. He also said that fantasy should be an escape- not an aspiration. Reality and fantasy rarely intersect. Save your fantasies for that which your hands can’t make in the world, and don’t sell yourself short. Love is a journey of personal development and timing. Those things go hand in hand. Fantasizing about the life you want is anesthetic- but like any anesthetic if you abuse it- instead of helping you get past something it can prevent you from getting where you want to be. One of the greatest life and survival tips I have is to be present in the moment. You can’t be present if you are somewhere else, and if you are in a fantasy at the moment you need to be in reality to notice or seize an opportunity- you miss out.
guest_
· 4 years ago
Imagination are healthy and wonderful. Imagination should seldom if ever be a substitute for being present in reality outside very rare circumstances where you need to “make it to the buzzer,” but life shouldn’t be lived as though you are waiting out the clock. You CAN change your circumstances. You CAN find a way out. You can be with someone and still be lonely too. Growth is hard but necessary. As much as it sucks- time is the magic ingredient. It keeps moving even if you don’t though- in 10 years it will be 2030 regardless of what you do- so use that time to search and grow and build, so that when you do find someone special, you don’t have to start building and be 10 years behind where you could have been.
jd1984
· 4 years ago
What guest_ said. Know your goal, in this case a happy marriage with a loving significant other; but live in the now. Go out and meet people, make friends, make a good home for yourself first. More will build upon that, so don't fantasize about the life you want too much, work to achieve it instead.
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