Oh man. Good grief. Young people are young people. Maybe they are bi or maybe one day they say “nah. I was hetero. That wasn’t for me..” or maybe they are homo, or pan, or poly and on their way there they figured they were bi because they didn’t know or understand their truth? But it isn’t just young people. We have people 40,50 or more years old with spouses and kids who suddenly are coming out as bi or poly or gay etc. why? Maybe because society is finally at a point where more people feel at least safe or secure or free enough to be themselves. You generally don’t only find out your gay at 50- you knew, or “feared” much younger but lived in a time and a world where you just couldn’t imagine being true. So what happens? Probably a destroyed marriage and broken home and all those years of your life and your (likely) ex partners lives that could have gone to a constructive relationship are wasted. A lot of human suffering because the world wouldn’t let you be you.
So maybeeee… the works is still far from safe and welcoming and inclusive of all types of sexualities and identities- but it’s good enough to start seeing a lot more people want to not waste their lives and the lives of others by trying to live a lie forced on them for no good reason? Maybe it’s not a bad thing or a thing to whisper and gossip about that we have more and more people being honest with themselves and the world? And maybe- sex was never binary or trinary to start where you’re “gay or straight” or “gay/straight/bi” but it’s a spectrum…? Maybe many people experience “homoerotic” thoughts and feelings and such and we can point to countless examples of “gay shit” in society passed off as straight because it’s so normalized while any degree of homosexuality has been persecuted- that if we called it out for what it is- we would have had to accept long ago that no one is “100% straight” and some people are “so straight that it’s gay” while some are “so gay that it’s straight?”
And that’s the thing right? We don’t even really have the common vernacular to discuss deviation from gender or sexual binary templates. We have to use terms like “that’s kinda gay” or “eliminate” or “butch” “tomboy” etc. we say things like “pretty boy” as though it should be an insult for a man to be.. what…? Beautiful? Because why? That doesn’t match our standard of masculinity if you don’t have skin like the Marlborough man and aren’t shaped like a brick or the Michelin man..? A woman who is strong or has a strong physique is generally likewise demeaned- we don’t have quite as special a term for it like “pretty boy” but asides words like “masculine” that make clear that her “womanhood” is diminished by her strength or build we have lots of creative and abusive words and phrases for a woman born or choosing to have a more physical build that defies soft curves and petiteness.
So are more kids Bi, or are more people able or willing to come forward and live their truth? The “erosion of traditional family” may have perhaps rid us of the shot gun weddings that saw so many boomers and those before walk down the isle to someone they’d spend their lives speaking ill of and hating while trying just to be civil enough to maintain their lifestyle and see the kids out of the house. The fear comes from the small among us, and it’s ok to be small, it’s not ok to let that fear rule you small ones.
Women working meant women not trapped to men who’s core appeal in dating was their ability to provide money to their jobless amour. Divorce being socially acceptable meant that a ring 30 years ago no longer trapped that spouse to a stagnant, hateful, neglectful, or careless partner. Open sexuality creates competition and adds complexity to finding and keeping a mate and Mai ring relationships. It means others get to be happy when some are unhappy because they don’t have…
.. the guts or the self esteem to go after what they want in life and feel trapped. If they are trapped, they want to know they aren’t alone in being trapped into an unhappy life. That’s most of what it is. That and a primitive caveman fear that “we” wether that’s a country or culture or whatever group one considers their own, “we” will be outbred by “them” if all “our” fellows don’t get to making babies to pass on the genes and the culture. Well-
It’s 2022 now y’all. Go marry a fuxkimg roller coaster man. Go be happy. And if you one day wake up and think you made a mistake? Pffft. Yeah. No “straight” person has ever felt any of their relationships were a mistake across 10 or 20 or more years. We all have those things in dating. That’s the point no? Go find what makes you happy and when you think you have it- hold on until it doesn’t and then… that’s another topic. But do you.
Women working meant women not trapped to men who’s core appeal in dating was their ability to provide money to their jobless amour. Divorce being socially acceptable meant that a ring 30 years ago no longer trapped that spouse to a stagnant, hateful, neglectful, or careless partner. Open sexuality creates competition and adds complexity to finding and keeping a mate and Mai ring relationships. It means others get to be happy when some are unhappy because they don’t have…
It’s 2022 now y’all. Go marry a fuxkimg roller coaster man. Go be happy. And if you one day wake up and think you made a mistake? Pffft. Yeah. No “straight” person has ever felt any of their relationships were a mistake across 10 or 20 or more years. We all have those things in dating. That’s the point no? Go find what makes you happy and when you think you have it- hold on until it doesn’t and then… that’s another topic. But do you.