He's Arnold, Arnold, Arnold Rimmer.
More reliable than a garden strimmer.
He's never been mistaken for Yul Brynner.
He's not bald, and his head doesn't glimmer.
Master of the wit and the repartee.
His command of space directives is uncanny.
How come he's such a genius?
Don't ask me!
Ask Arnold, Arnold, Arnold Rimmer.
He's also a fantastic swimmer.
And if you play your cards right
Then he just might come round for dinner.
More reliable than a garden strimmer.
He's never been mistaken for Yul Brynner.
He's not bald, and his head doesn't glimmer.
Master of the wit and the repartee.
His command of space directives is uncanny.
How come he's such a genius?
Don't ask me!
Ask Arnold, Arnold, Arnold Rimmer.
He's also a fantastic swimmer.
And if you play your cards right
Then he just might come round for dinner.