Nice to know that we are loved!

Sitting in class imagining yourself as the gun man

The best way is this:
"If this door is yes, and this door is no, which door is safe?"

I just got this! I saw it like two hours ago and I just got it! I was like, "ok he put his hammer on the Nutella and they all know they're not as good as Nutella." This is way better!

HAHAHAHAHAHA i got "chicks touch themselves thinking about you"

So, the real question here is, since she seems a little upset... Is SHE on her period? (I'm so sorry haha the opertunity was to good!)

You know what else is important Dave? KNOWING HOW TO SPELL WORDS. Communication is the best tool humans have. Don't believe me? The bible says so.

This would work above the Mason-Dixon Line. Sorry yanks, but yall just ain't as nice as we are! Granted, down here, you're less likely to have something stolen in the first place

Forget driving, how does she get into the car???

The only reason the Holy Guy in the sky is endorsing Apple is cause he's met Steve Jobs. Probably still talks to him. Can you imagine how awkward it would be to tell dead Steve that you were switching companies? "Hey look, Steve, you're a great guy and all, but android is just easier and my boi the pope isn't the most tech savvy guy... Also Moses said that he used your maps software. That's why he got lost, you really think I did that?"

Ausies-1 Russia-Too drunk to care

Well I have caught a chicken and I'm 230 lbs. I'm not a runner let's say.

PUH REACH

Yeah ok, these people are messed up, but TERRORISTS?! Terrorists kill people. The word you are looking for is pervert. Terrorists chop off heads, pervs want some head. Big big difference here. It's down right offensive to our military, calling these people terrorists.