Unlock Luigi by entering the 3 numbers on the back too!

This looks like if Cloudy with a chance of Meatballs made Aladdin.

It's a part of the school system. It's designed to prepare kids for their daily societal routines. And for a lot of those kids, that's going to be working a crappy 9-to-5 job where compliance to the boss's wishes are more important than being an individual. It's a part of being a member of society.

You just ate a decomposing body. Enjoy the host of new bacteria you just introduced to your meat suit.

Nope nope nope nope. Keep those blood vessels under a smooth membrane, please.

"Switch to C"

Darker than the Challenger Deep.

Guys, there's going to be a third tom holland spiderman movie. Sony owns the character, they made Spider-verse. They know what they're doing now.

You can just tell the hospital "I read something funny on the internet".

Too damn soon!!!

I'm #2 and #3. That's why I like Commander.

A gentleman doesn't refer to it as "conquests".

As a Democrat in Texas, I feel you.

Downey Jr. and Evans both wanted to be done with their characters; they chose to leave, not the studios. They could have made Iron Man and Captain America movies forever if the actors wanted to. But they didn't.

He was only a writer/producer for the office, not a creator. But the other three shows are so good, we'll give him credit anyways.

Nope nope nope nope noooooooope

There was a tiny restaurant in Monroe, Louisiana where I ordered their Muffaletta sandwich. The waiter had to ask me three times what I wanted, until I had to point to the menu. He said, "I didn't even know we made that" and went back into the kitchen. 30 minutes later my sandwich shows up. "Sorry that took so long" he says. "We had to call the owner to figure out how to make this thing."
It was the best damn sandwich I've ever had in my life. An absolute work of art. God bless those people for being willing to call the owner at home.

I straight up can't read the punchline.

Because not everyone knows how to spell sphinx. or quartz.

cursed meme

Cursed image

Terry Pratchett and Neil Gaiman agree

It doesn't fit into the song at all. Like, at all.