MatthewG

matthewg

38, Male, California USA
Currently employed as ER Tech.
Proud father of 2, with a long-distance Boo.

— MatthewG
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Who else studies with a hedgehog? 6 comments
matthewg · 5 years ago
Maybe turn your phone off?
Just a humble beginning suggestion.
Me irl 3 comments
matthewg · 5 years ago
I don't get it.
Well then 3 comments
matthewg · 5 years ago
*Americans, the Hot Cheeto of the global diet
*plays the Smash Bros. theme in the background* 84 comments
When you gotta bring the groceries in the house in one trip 5 comments
matthewg · 5 years ago
Your anal subterfuge never ceases to amaze, my friend.
1
Something to ponder about 7 comments
matthewg · 5 years ago
Meh, I'd invite Louis to my table. But ground rules are if your cock comes out, it's getting slapped.
1
Well At Least We're Learning Something 17 comments
matthewg · 5 years ago
And they can look at and listen to my tender, perky little b-hole.
Company picnic 17 comments
matthewg · 5 years ago
Har de har har.
Deep af 38 comments
matthewg · 5 years ago
It was.
Sometimes I wonder if I should even stay on FS. It often seems to bring out the worst in me.
1
Absolutely disgusting 4 comments
matthewg · 5 years ago
Your 8's whats?
Skip intro 5 comments
Women are soo funny haha lols 9 comments
matthewg · 5 years ago
Helpful Hint: If someone plays along, it's not harrassment.
4
That pre-warning wansnt necessary at all 8 comments
matthewg · 5 years ago
Hey, now. More for the rest of us.
Honestly, I worry about a meat shortage in the near future. *cue dick jokes*
That pre-warning wansnt necessary at all 8 comments
matthewg · 5 years ago
Are....is this an alt account of yours where you just go around being a Chad for funsies?
I would pay good money to see this guy get the shit kicked out of him. 10 comments
matthewg · 5 years ago
"I get straight As.
Also, I can't be arsed to follow rules, instruction, procedure, etc.
Please use kid gloves with me so I can be a mortal threat to my fellow Americans in any and all situations, combat and otherwise!?"
4
"Houseboat" 2 comments
matthewg · 5 years ago
@kakaburra I'd love to make that sort of house a Home with mah Boo. <3
1
*plays the Smash Bros. theme in the background* 84 comments
matthewg · 5 years ago
What if I told you there were/are gay confederates?
“Back when I worked at petsmart I took this picture of this hamster who literally 4 comments
matthewg · 5 years ago
Seen't the exact same thing with full title on Imgur.
When you want to be scientist but hoe is life! 8 comments
matthewg · 5 years ago
Yeah, this is an old joke told by all Biology teachers in high school.
1
When you gotta bring the groceries in the house in one trip 5 comments
matthewg · 5 years ago
That strap looks to be tied in a Balloon Knot.
1
True? 13 comments
matthewg · 5 years ago
iunderstoodthatreference.jpg
1
True? 13 comments
matthewg · 5 years ago
Please don't body shame, please and thank you.
1
well technically it's true 5 comments
matthewg · 5 years ago
With Science. You know, that thing Drumpf doesn't believe in when it suits him.
1
Never underestimate my power 10 comments
matthewg · 5 years ago
Fun joke, butt still.
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Whitish 7 comments
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