Men say so many less words because the women won't let them speak....they're talking the whole time.

If you don't swap their face, they look like a hideous lesbian couple......

I believe you mean "perfect sweater for your CHILD'S first date"

Silly ancients. Princess Leia wore a bikini.....

...he went to college in America.....before either............

your grandmother uses the moveable head to masturbate.

This is on Kadena, a US base on Okinawa.

As a proud resident of the state of Arkansas......I'm not sure I understand why this is a joke.

he really does take every role......

What if the question is what I should eat to help with my diabeetus?

Now this feller here has the right idear. That woman there should be in the KITCHEN makin' him somethin' really good to eat.

Shucks, I heard over in that thar Korean place that you can just save the trouble and use both to make yer burger a double.

Well shoot, I coulda toldja that you don't need none of that fancy college stuff. I learned me how to catch frogs n' fry em up over a burnin' tire when I was knee-high to a grasshopper. That's how we do things here in 'murica.

Well lookie here, Herschel. It looks like we've got ourselves someone who wants to tell us how to use proper 'murican spanish. Listen here, in 'murica, words mean what they say we mean. In your ching chang chong mexican spanish, lechuga probably means lettuce or some other non-fat-filled, non-meat, hippie-lovin' thing. Here in 'murica, Lechuga means never give up. I know fer a fact one of them fire-fightin' fellers in the twin towers on 9/11 said this and it's the only reason he got out alive. Are you tryin' to tell me that a 'murican hero is wrong? Well, missy, I think you better just gitcherself off of this page.