I'm loyal to tap water
I put it in a reusable bottle so I don't waste plastic

You got a free black flag to show your allegiance to the pirates!

Motherfucker

Ah yes
The bitchy resting face
I apparently have that and resting sad face at the same time
I'm a sad bitch

No wonder they're endangered

Seriously though am I the only one who wears one outfit for the whole week (two if I'm feeling fancy)? It seems everyone around me wears a different one every day. Where do they get the time to think about them and put them together?

Damn rich werewolves

To be fair dolphins try to fuck almost everything, don't they? I don't think humans are an exception.

Baby steps. Start going to the gym, you'll feel healthier. Start looking for a job but evaluate your priorities, you don't have to take the first thing if it seems like a shit job that'd only make you miserable. Help your aunt with chores. Little things like that. Progress doesn't happen overnight.

The smol one on the right trying to fit in by also climbing a broom... my heart

Amazon pays its employees so little many of them have to be on food stamps. Therefore, in a way, Amazon is receiving government help, since the government has to make up for what Amazon should be paying the people in the first place. Therefore, Jeff Bezos is the world's biggest welfare queen. Let's put this out there and shame him or politicians into doing something about it.

Thrift stores are the best thing since sliced bread.
Good quality clothes for so little money? Hell yeah. Plus you're not supporting companies that use unethical labor with your money.

This sounds like a joke but tbh eye contact is very important while driving. That's how you know the other driver is aware of you. Once I was crossing a road on a pedestrian crossing and I saw a car approaching, the driver was an old man who looked like he didn't even know what was going on around him, like he had horse blinders on his eyes. I decided to let him pass before crossing but the guy in front of me assumed the old man would let him cross as he was going slowly, but no, the old man would've run him over if he didn't jump out of the way at the last second.
That's why eye contact is important.
And why old people should retake their driving exams regularly once they're over a certain age.

Boomer: *calls millennials lazy to the point the two words become synonyms in the minds of many people*
Millennials/Zoomers: ok boomer
Boomer: *clutches pearls*
This is not universal obviously. I've met my fair share of asshole boomers as well as asshole young people, tbh there are assholes in every generation. But what bothers me about the boomers specifically (again, obviously not all, but a sizeable chunk of those I've met) is their complete disregard for the environment. My grandma for example doesn't even recycle because, and I quote, she "won't be alive to experience the consequences". The ironic thing is that many boomers claim they care about family and family values. Well clearly you don't when you don't even want to change your lifestyle mildly to prevent your kids and grandkids from burning in the dumpster fire this planet will become.

Cat: *realizes he's surrounded by water*
Cat: [screams internally]

Tom is great but SpongeBob will always be the meme king

*Life Day