Accurate

1)Run far away
2) Run farther and faster

Scream as loud as I humanly possible, then proceed to screech demanding for someone to kill it... and burn the entire house while they are at it. Then, when the police shows up because someone had heard such horrifying screams and called them thinking someone was torturing or attempting to murder me. Then, all while I continue hyperventilating, I try to explain to them my screams were due to a unspeakable arachnid monster, of nightmarish hellish size, that was, quite obviously, another spawn from hell.

ride it into battle!

*in mah hometown*
oh, hey joe, how ya doin?
you know you can always use the shower as a hiding spot, not my dirty laundry.
then id make it a bed, feed it some mutant flies that i caught myself, and sing to it.

change your pants

Scream bloody murder then dramatically fall to the floor and faint. Once I regain consensus and discover that the horrid beast is no where in sight, I shall then proceed with great caution to rapidly (but gingerly) stuff my favorite books, some snacks, and a blanket into a suitcase. I will then arrange to be deported to Mars where I shall frequently relive the catastrophe in nightmares.

Put the shirt back on top of if and run while grabbing my laptop

Give it it's shirt back before it gets angry

Nice and calm;y place the shirt back down and stomp the living shit out of shirt/spider. When there is no doubt of it being alive anymore, slowly back away never removing my eyes from it, getting something to scoop it up. Scoop the thing up into a bag and fling it like a cat by it's tail as far from my house as humanly possible. Last set house on fire (encase there are anymore inside), and move the Hell out of that country. lol

Slowly and calmly blow my house up with a bomb. Maybe two. Actually, make it a nuclear one!

die

Take a deep calming breath, and burn my house down to the ground.

Flip a shit

Drop to your knees and freaking worship it it's the freaking god of all spiders and it came to your house, show some respect, geez.

WHY DO WE FUCKING HAVE TO PUT THIS ON THE FUN SECTION?!?!

1. Board the nope train.
2. nope nope nope nope nope nope

Hey lil buddy... Playing hide and seek aren't ya?

throw whatever i picked up back on
then scream as loud as humanly possible
then run
fast

Have heart failure

ALL ABOARD THE AWH HELL NO EXPRESS!!!

Hair spray and a lighter and/or a fire extinguisher if available.

and everybody wonders why I have a sword collection

Stomp it to death on impulse. Then realize I am barefoot and loose my shit getting all the bits of spider off my foot.

run as fast as hell screaming the entire time and then spend the next few hours shivering and crying from the horror.

Jump on the train to Screwthatville

I FREAKING BURN IT BEFORE IT LAYS EGGS

Can we please have a 'spider version' of NSFW?? That way I might be able to sleep at night..

NOPW