i think if they didn't make adoption nearly impossible it would be much more normal. my friend who couldn't conceive managed to conceive before they could get anywhere in adoption.
I don't really want children but I have PCOS so even if I did want it would be very hard to get. adoption sounds nice though, I'd like someone to look up to me.
Poly-Cystic Ovary Syndrome. fat around the ovaries that gives me no to very irregular periods, facial hair and little to no chance of getting pregnant.
if you are adopting a baby its probably done privately and you're also going to pay the costs incurred by the mother.... a quick google search says adoption is 8-40k with an average of 10-14k, and birthing is an average of 3.5k
also i am pretty sure thats the actual cost and not what you will pay with insurance, and i think uninsured mothers in the US get federal assistance of some sort, i recall one of my coworkers waited to get married till after they had the baby cuz it was cheaper for her do "single mother" than be on his insurance (and thats federal insurance too so yeah)
There are lots of reasons to adopt that have nothing to do with the inability to conceive. Some people don't want to pass on negative genetic traits like mental illness or hereditary disease.
As well, age can also be a factor. My husband and I are discussing adoption. We got married 2 years ago and I have a son from a previous relationship (who is in his late teens). I know I can conceive, but being in my late thirties I know there is also a higher risk for complications. My in-laws adopted 2 of their 5 kids and it seems like it may be the right thing for us and our situation.
I'm making a conscious decision not to have my own kids for several reasons and one of them is mental illness that I don't want to pass on to anyone. My best friend went through the foster care system and my cousin is adopted from Russia. A lot of countries are cutting off international adoptions which, I guess I can see both sides of that argument. But people forget how many kids are right here in the states who need loving families. Either way, people should make their own decision without worrying about judgement. For example: my older sister is pregnant with her and her husband's fifth child and got all upset and basically started preaching at me when I told her I want to adopt when I'm ready for kids. Like, what?
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· 9 years ago
As someone who is later today going to get her adoption finalized, let me tell you that the process is fucking hell for all involved. But when it's over and you're finally able to be part of the family in every way that matters, every tear and heartache is worth it.
My best friend is the youngest of 5 and he's the only adopted one( and his parents aren't to old to have kids for those of you saying that's why he was adopted)
I have a family member who in doing an interfamily adoption (adopting a family members child so they don't get put in the system ), its going to cost at least $12000, and thats extremely cheap for an adoption because its a guardianship transfer.
Yep. Especially when its SAVING the government the money it would cost to keep him in foster homes or group homes.
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· 9 years ago
In Canada its waaaaay cheaper to adopt a child with disabilities. My brother is adopted and he has Golden-Harr Syndrome. If he were 'normal' looking and had full hearing he probably never would have made it out of the system
But it is hard enough to adopt now that mostly people who can't have kids adopt, if we were to add more people, some people who can't have kids would never be able to adopt, while people who can would
Sorry to burst your bubble but a lot of the kids are mentally damaged and from bad homes. They don't know how to use the bathroom or refuse to because they think if they smell bad then no one will come near them to hurt them. I have worked with kids in foster care and it's downright disgusting how they've been treated by people that were supposed to care for them, and quite often that's the reason people don't want to adopt, because the kids are damaged and 'hard to handle' and people don't want to dedicate the time and effort. You'd be dealing with a lot more than just potty training an 8 year old.
Really, because half my family have been adopted, and I have worked with several foster families. While a few had problems, abandonment issues, ptsd, they were potty trained. Even the worst issues can be delt with, as long as you actually address them and don't ignore the problem or child, and more importantly don't belittle the child.
(I'm same guest as above, not sure why my experience has been downvoted). Well that's great you've had that experience! And of course I'm not saying that all kids are like that. But all of my experiences (or a large majority) have been that the kids are really hard done by. Of course, with patience and genuine care those kids can grow up to become great adults, I was just merely pointing out that it's not as easy as 'but they'll be potty trained'.
yeah sure, let's raise kids with shit genes instead of our own
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· 9 years ago
Are you saying that kids in the foster care system and those up for adoption have shitty genes? Wtf is wrong with you
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· 9 years ago
I didn't know I signed up for Let'sAllPostOurOpinions.org instead of funsubstance? Sorry wrong site.. -_-
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· 9 years ago
You have a fundamental misunderstanding of what a comment section is for. Its for writing your opinions or observations related to the post. And if you don't want to read the comments, don't
As well, age can also be a factor. My husband and I are discussing adoption. We got married 2 years ago and I have a son from a previous relationship (who is in his late teens). I know I can conceive, but being in my late thirties I know there is also a higher risk for complications. My in-laws adopted 2 of their 5 kids and it seems like it may be the right thing for us and our situation.