"She waited until I was rotten drunk and had wandered outside to have a sleep on the lawn. That's when she came and took advantage of my bleak situation.
'
The worst part about this story is that some of my mates were there when she made her move. Instead of telling her to leave me alone, they encouraged her and said: “Why don’t you put him on the back of the ute?”
'
She dragged me over to my neighbour's ute and somehow managed to get me up on the tray. I will leave what happened next to your imagination.
I got in touch with one of my friends who was there the following week to ask him about what happened to me, as my memory of the night was blurred due to the large quantities of alcohol that I had consumed.
'
He instantly started laughing and said, “you were like a lamb led to the slaughter,” to which I replied, “geeze, thanks a lot mate for stopping that”. His response was, “oh well, it was a bit of a laugh wasn’t it.”
'
Unfortunately, the whole community where I was staying heard about what happened, and they, like my mate, thought it was a huge joke. I was given grief about the incident by everyone until I left to come back home to New Zealand.
'
A month after being back home I caught up with one of my Kiwi friends who was working for another farmer in the same district. Within 10 minutes of catching up with him he burst out laughing and said: “Remember that time you got raped?”
Since I was abused I have been really disgusted by everyone’s response to this incident. They might see the funny side in it but I certainly do not.
'
If I was a young female who passed out drunk at a party and was sexually abused by a male twice her age, I am sure that everyone would be very mad about the situation."
'
https://i.stuff.co.nz/life-style/life/105898329/im-a-man-who-was-raped-by-a-women-twice-my-age
Okay, @mrscollector, first of all, it's "raped", not "rapped". It was getting on my nerves. I apologize but I had to say that. {I am also a feminist, but that's a long story for another comment section}
Second of all, according to RAINN, the national website for rape, incest, and sexual abuse, women are raped more often than men, especially from the ages 15-35. That is a FACT.
(((However, that does NOT mean:
1. Men are not raped
2. Men cannot be raped.)))
I am a complete and total believer in the fact that women and men should speak up, speak out, and say something when they're uncomfortable. It is extremely important that rape is reported. It is uncomfortable. It is painful. But speaking up that you were raped will set you free!
I'm going to tell a personal story here. I'm a girl, by the way. When I was very young, my best friend's dad, who lived in the apartment below us, raped me while his son slept next to us. I don't remember very much due to the trauma.
Now I'm not exactly sure why I'm telling you this. I want to get my story out I guess. I want to prove to you that women are raped and it doesn't go reported. I can't report my rape. It was years ago. I don't remember his face. I don't know their last name. I don't have any real information besides the apartment they lived in for a few years and the fact that the father, my rapist, was a heavy drug user and sniffed paint. That's why his apartment smelled the way it did. I found that out later. Maybe this story won't affect you at all. Maybe I'm wasting my time. I don't know. I just wanted to get if off my chest. I know you have a young daughter, @mrscollector. Raise her to be a feminist. Raise her to understand that her body is her own, and no one else's. Raise her to love herself and others. Raise her to speak up. It's too late for four year old me, but not for your daughter. Understand that.
I find myself at a bit of a loss for words. What a horrendous thing to go through. I am so dearly thankful you haven't let the monster and trauma destroy your ability to find hope and happiness. I know you've struggled with it at times.
'
Thank you for sharing your story, my friend
@sunflowers I have said my peace on this matter and want to let it rest. But please be aware that some people on this site are not just misspelling or useing poor grammar due to lack of care or what have you. Some of us are dyslexic. I for one am. It even says so in my bio. So excuse me for any spelling or grammar that I may have did wrong that offended you. I. Trying the best I can. Let alone I am on a phone that has a monster of an auto correct.
Also I am raising my daughter to be an Equalist like myself. Because I grew up with 5 brothers and I see how people who call themselves Feminist treat men. My daughter knows how to love her self and others. But she also k ows this world shouldn't be about trying to put one type of people above others. It needs to be about treating everyone as Equals.
Also I am sorry that happen to you. But you didn't need to prove women get raped and it doesn't get reported that happens to often enough.
Continued...
But what some people don't understand is with men if the attacker wasn't an adult while they were a kid, or another male while they are teens or older than the cops and everyone else don't care. If their attackers is female while they are teens and older they can't report it. No matter how hard they try. I know because one of my dearest friends was raped by a woman. He was 23 at the time. I don't like going into detail because it is his story. But he was with this girl for around 3 or 4 years and he wanted to wait till married for sex he is a sweetheart of a guy. Very religious, yet believed God teaches love not hate. But that bitch would beat him like her own punching bag. He never laid a finger on her. The last straw was he told me she been telling her alot they need to have sex but he tell her no. So one night he was very sick and he took cold medicine. He woke up to her on top of him she tied him down and she didn't let him go till she was done.
He went to the cops they laughed.
@mrscollector I didn't mention your spelling, Hon. I didn't actually address you again at all that I remember-- I just thanked sunflowers for sharing their rather harrowing experience
'
And, indeed, sadly, pathetically men raped by women are insanely less likely than the reverse to have any kind of validation offered to them
Sorry lmao -.- stupid dyslexia is out to get me. Lmfao so sorry my brain said "yeah @xvarnah is the one." And really it was... hold on triple checking... @sunflowers did it. So truly sorry I fixed it. Lol ( -.-) *looks at brain* "you little idiot stop getting me in trouble"
Haha it's fine, I figured that's what happened. Although I'm sick and sleep deprived atm so I'll admit at first I had to scroll up and be like "wait a sec... DID I say that??"
I'm sick as well lol my cold is kicking my ass. My poor kid is getting hit worse due to her medical condition she was born with. So her cold is making her vomit like a fountain.
Oh God that's rough :/ hopefully it's just a cold and not the flu
'
I'm just trying to think of it like: 2019 is already going to be off to a good start because my health is going to be better than it was in 2018 x)
@xvarnah
Thank you dearly for your loveliness and acceptance. It has been a strange, painful, yet wonderful journey through life and I now know that I am not destined to leave this world by my own hand. I tried once but failed, and I am so glad! I love being alive! I love the world! I'm so fucking happy!
You say that like the monopoly is something any gender WANTS to have o.o also this largely depends on which countries you're including in your statistics (certainly Brazil, India, and many parts of Africa can't be counted), whether you're counting each offence against the same person individually, each offence only commited by different offenders, or each victim as a standalone.
'
Either way, prison rape IS a rather horrific problem that also needs to be addressed. I think your stats are decently skewed, but that doesn't make either issue any less valid.
@xvarnah you need to remember the majority of men that were rapped will not be coming forward due to fear of people not believing him or even thinking he should of liked it.
Men are rapped just as much as woman are but a woman has the world saying don't be scared we will protect you. While boys are being told it is their fault for getting rapped. Or they should be counted lucky.
Guys live in a world where they can't ask for help if they are the abused ones or the rapped ones.
If a cop comes to a house because of domestic violence. They will instantly handcuff the man and ask the woman what he did. When it could of been she was beating him to death and he couldn't get away.
Stuff like this is why I am an equalist NOT A FEMINIST!
I never forgot that fact. You need to remember a lot of women still don't come forward, either. And I guarantee in any one of the countries/continent I mentioned men are not raped more than women.
'
Additionally, not all the inmates mentioned in prison rape statistics are male. Female prisoners are also serially assaulted on a fairly regular basis.
'
As an added note: cops will not instantly handcuff a man. They will separate the two, likely handcuff both, but, in most instances, it will be the male who is arrested.
'
I'm pretty sure I've actually been one of the more vocal advocates for men not being listened to or heard on this website tbh so I'm not sure why you felt the need to call me out specifically.
All I said was no gender wants to have the monopoly on sexual assault statistics, it depends WHICH statistics you include, and that prison rape is a serious issue.
'
As a final point - feminists want equality. The ones who try and raise women above men are hypocrites, and don't really fit under the feminist title-- they just like to drag it through the mud. Not that I identify as anything, I just think the bad apples have made people lose sight of what feminism is actually about. They've taken a mission about equality and twisted it into something ridiculous
So how about this let's say that both get rapped or sexually assulted. And both men and women need to be aware that in this day in age there is no need to be scared of coming out to have those who did it to them arrested.
We also need to have more places not just for women but for men as well to go if they feel unsafe.
Even if their attackers be of the opposite or same sex.
No victim should hide they were attacked. Because it was never their fault.
1Reply
deleted
· 6 years ago
I think rape is funny in the right context.
Not the time my dad did it to me though. That was a horrible terrible no good very bad context.
'
The worst part about this story is that some of my mates were there when she made her move. Instead of telling her to leave me alone, they encouraged her and said: “Why don’t you put him on the back of the ute?”
'
She dragged me over to my neighbour's ute and somehow managed to get me up on the tray. I will leave what happened next to your imagination.
'
He instantly started laughing and said, “you were like a lamb led to the slaughter,” to which I replied, “geeze, thanks a lot mate for stopping that”. His response was, “oh well, it was a bit of a laugh wasn’t it.”
'
Unfortunately, the whole community where I was staying heard about what happened, and they, like my mate, thought it was a huge joke. I was given grief about the incident by everyone until I left to come back home to New Zealand.
'
A month after being back home I caught up with one of my Kiwi friends who was working for another farmer in the same district. Within 10 minutes of catching up with him he burst out laughing and said: “Remember that time you got raped?”
'
If I was a young female who passed out drunk at a party and was sexually abused by a male twice her age, I am sure that everyone would be very mad about the situation."
'
https://i.stuff.co.nz/life-style/life/105898329/im-a-man-who-was-raped-by-a-women-twice-my-age
Second of all, according to RAINN, the national website for rape, incest, and sexual abuse, women are raped more often than men, especially from the ages 15-35. That is a FACT.
(((However, that does NOT mean:
1. Men are not raped
2. Men cannot be raped.)))
I am a complete and total believer in the fact that women and men should speak up, speak out, and say something when they're uncomfortable. It is extremely important that rape is reported. It is uncomfortable. It is painful. But speaking up that you were raped will set you free!
I'm going to tell a personal story here. I'm a girl, by the way. When I was very young, my best friend's dad, who lived in the apartment below us, raped me while his son slept next to us. I don't remember very much due to the trauma.
'
Thank you for sharing your story, my friend
Also I am raising my daughter to be an Equalist like myself. Because I grew up with 5 brothers and I see how people who call themselves Feminist treat men. My daughter knows how to love her self and others. But she also k ows this world shouldn't be about trying to put one type of people above others. It needs to be about treating everyone as Equals.
Also I am sorry that happen to you. But you didn't need to prove women get raped and it doesn't get reported that happens to often enough.
Continued...
He went to the cops they laughed.
'
And, indeed, sadly, pathetically men raped by women are insanely less likely than the reverse to have any kind of validation offered to them
'
I'm just trying to think of it like: 2019 is already going to be off to a good start because my health is going to be better than it was in 2018 x)
Thank you dearly for your loveliness and acceptance. It has been a strange, painful, yet wonderful journey through life and I now know that I am not destined to leave this world by my own hand. I tried once but failed, and I am so glad! I love being alive! I love the world! I'm so fucking happy!
'
Either way, prison rape IS a rather horrific problem that also needs to be addressed. I think your stats are decently skewed, but that doesn't make either issue any less valid.
Men are rapped just as much as woman are but a woman has the world saying don't be scared we will protect you. While boys are being told it is their fault for getting rapped. Or they should be counted lucky.
Guys live in a world where they can't ask for help if they are the abused ones or the rapped ones.
If a cop comes to a house because of domestic violence. They will instantly handcuff the man and ask the woman what he did. When it could of been she was beating him to death and he couldn't get away.
Stuff like this is why I am an equalist NOT A FEMINIST!
'
Additionally, not all the inmates mentioned in prison rape statistics are male. Female prisoners are also serially assaulted on a fairly regular basis.
'
As an added note: cops will not instantly handcuff a man. They will separate the two, likely handcuff both, but, in most instances, it will be the male who is arrested.
'
I'm pretty sure I've actually been one of the more vocal advocates for men not being listened to or heard on this website tbh so I'm not sure why you felt the need to call me out specifically.
'
As a final point - feminists want equality. The ones who try and raise women above men are hypocrites, and don't really fit under the feminist title-- they just like to drag it through the mud. Not that I identify as anything, I just think the bad apples have made people lose sight of what feminism is actually about. They've taken a mission about equality and twisted it into something ridiculous
We also need to have more places not just for women but for men as well to go if they feel unsafe.
Even if their attackers be of the opposite or same sex.
No victim should hide they were attacked. Because it was never their fault.
Not the time my dad did it to me though. That was a horrible terrible no good very bad context.