@shikharizard No more drowning kittens. The other option would be to meat-mince your hands but I don't need to give @aviva a charge to arrest me on
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· 5 years ago
Ahhhhhh, well I'm afraid this is a case you'll have to bring up with @Xvarnah.
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P.S. good news! The 40 @kittenfluffs I ordered should be here in about 1 hour according to the tracking number, so i can add another 40 to Xvarnah's conscience
Breaking News: @Xvarnah Supports Kitten Killings.
A local user of a website came out as anti-cat. She expressed her hate by saying “I believe kittens are killing earth and they need to die.“
In Other News: Famous Gangster, @Shikharizard , Gets Arrested For Animal Assault and Threatening to Kill a Lady.
@Catfluff reported the hurt her people were going through this morning. She said a gangster(popularly known as Shikharizard) left a cat corpse at her door-step every night of last week. She stated how afraid she was for her life. She said: “I‘m afraid for my life.“
That‘s all we have at the moment. Stay tuned for more outrageous stories.
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· 5 years ago
My favourite part was: "I'm afraid for my life"
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Can you put the article on a poster for me? I want to hang it on my wall.
@Catfluff As soon as we can find our cameraman.
@shikharizard You means when she poops in her pants, or when she spills beans on your favorite t-shirt?
I find it interesting you're more focused on my age than the fact that I apparently know enough about your clothing to have access to your favourite shirt
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· 5 years ago
I find it more interesting that you have access to and know which shirt is my favourite, before I've even taken yours off. Usually, those things take place in the reverse order, but I'm cool with it. Also I'm glad it was my favourite shirt and not the other possibility.
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So how old are you?
Even more interesting is the fact that I took said favourite shirt specifically to spill beans on it. Also bold of you to assume I wear shirts
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Older than I was yesterday
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· 5 years ago
Yeah that was a piece of pure @Aviva magic. Bold of you not to wear a shirt. I like girls who don't wear shirts- or anything else.
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Which is how old exactly?
In a shocking twist of events I don't even like beans
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Younger than I'll be by the time this comment posts
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· 5 years ago
Take that up with pixie. I wasn't the one who selected the possible endings- both being atrocious options. I feel like you not responding directly to my comment means you were already aware of the information I provided. This upsets me as I'm usually quite secretive about these things.
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How many years old will you be on your birthday in 2019?
@shikharizard it was admittedly a lose-lose situation. But your second favourite shirt should appreciate the promotion
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I had an inclination you might feel that way, although I very much suspect it depends on the person in question
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· 5 years ago
@Xvarnah I have like 20 shirts. I bought 2 more today, and I only went looking for ties. I don't have a favourite, so you can pour beans over any of them.
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I had a feeling you might choose to continue being a coward, although, I suppose one cannot expect more from someone who intentionally allows kittens to drown on her account ;)
Do you always invite people to pour beans on your clothing or how did I get so "lucky?" (Also it sounds like you shopped like a girl)
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Your account is the one drowning them, I'm just a bystander in this <.<
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· 5 years ago
Actually, that was Aviva. I don't recall inviting you until it had already been decided. But yes, I suppose you are lucky mama-bear. It's a rare a special privilege being in proximity to me. So what if I did girlfriend?
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You are the causation, the culprit, the criminal, the mastermind and the buck stops with you. You should be ashamed of yourself!
She may have made the initiation, but you just gave me free reign to pour beans over any of your shirts. Are you channelling your inner sassy black woman/gay man? Cause idk if I'm ready for this
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I definitely didn't mastermind anything <.< though if I DID that would have been pretty impressive on my part. Can I be ashamed of myself for different reasons? Does that count?
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· 5 years ago
Pick a shirt and get it over with mama-bear. Fair bet though, I get to pour beans on one of yours too ok? Deal? And sassy black-woman since you were wondering.
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I distinctly remember you telling me to drown kittens to coerce the non-dead part of your heart to tell the truth. No you may not be ashamed with yourself for other reasons.. this is the only one!
But the suspense is the best part! Why are you suddenly interested in pouring beans on my shirt?
I'm definitely not prepared for that and yet I'm riveted
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Interesting one of the voices took on the sound of mine in your head somehow <.< and bolder still of you to assume all of my heart isn't dead.
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This opens up a world of new activities, in that case
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· 5 years ago
It's a fair wager. One of yours for one of mine, deal or not?
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Well, seeing as it was your voice, from your body that explained this to me, it corroborates that you are in fact a monster. Also, everyone knows your heart is mostly intact. Constantly trying to protect the babies from corruption, or comfort the million and a half wounded souls who seek solace on this site.
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I'd love to know what activities sweet mama-bear thinks this opens the door for. Can I join?
We could just pour beans on our own shirts and call it even. Or on aviva's shirt since she started this mess
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Not sure how I feel about my body being in your head but okay <.< I'm to be a monster trying to protect babies and wounded souls, am I?
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Given your trepidation of Rosalinas I'm not sure you'd have the stomach <.<
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· 5 years ago
You're so suspicious! Literally nothing is plug and play with you. I think we should definitely both pour beans on Aviva and grim and catfluff, and 2 tons on guest, and drown tbag alive in them.
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Oh it's been in my head for sometime ;)
And apparently so. Self-proclaimed a high likelihood of a completely dead heart, clesrly happy to murder 100s of cats.. yet somehow always willing to nurture every broken bird who somebody was mean to and now they need their mommy.
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Jokes aside, while Rosalinas says some scary shit sometimes, I've called her on it and told her she's not as scary as she pretends to be.
The fact that literally any of you think you COULD be more potentially extreme than I COULD (if i had to) is laughable
@shikharizard it would be so much more boring if I were, though. Just think: you'd go home at the end of the day, scrub the stains out of your shirts, and never have to worry about killing cats. Also your homicidal tendencies are showing, again
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Along with dr_richard_ew 's apparently. And I have not personally murdered any cats <.< I'm pretty sure I haven't nurtured EVERY one. Besides, what better way to build an army of loyal subjects?
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No idea. I've never given much thought to Rosalina tbh. I think we've had a grand total of two interactions of any length with her, one where it was the "broken bird" scenario, and the other ended in her declaring I was a SJW because of nipples.
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I'm not sure it's a competition. <.< I've never tried to be extreme. I'm not sure what would happen if I were ever forced into a situation where I needed to be. How's that quote go? "Hold a man over the edge of a volcano and on that day you will meet the man."
@catfluff I think it was like the porn-and-beans kind of beans, so I'm not sure you'd not have drowned
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· 5 years ago
@Catfluff thank you, that made me laugh
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@Xvarnah SCRUB? ME? Fuck no. I’d literally just throw it away and buy a new one. Nobody has time to scrub. Killing cats has never worried me. I don’t enjoy it, but you force me to. So I may be murderous, but you’re heartless
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Lol. I called doc’s bluff, I have no interest in playing with his bits. Yours on the other hand could be fun, but idk we’ve never met. And as for you and your army - the people in question could be defeated by loud noises and a stiff breeze. Loyal though the weaklings and cowards may be, they could be defeated by a playful puppy.
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Eh, I was just saying she was next closest person.
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If it was a competition, I would win. That goes for virtually any competition. If it came down to between you and me, and who was willing to do something more extreme, you could go off like Krakatoa, but I would split the earth in two by comparison. FYI for the example to make, google the eruption of and aftermath of Kra.
For a second I was thinking "I never called you a scrub," but then I got back on track. You say that like you find it easy to replace favourite shirts. Now I didn't say you ENJOYED it, I just said it's more entertaining
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I'd say some of them are infinitely braver and stronger than you give them credit for <.< particularly our little Aviva. Though lord knows Grim's been through more than enough recently, but I haven't enlisted him as of yet. Still, if they have to fail, at the paws of a puppy is definitely the way to go. Also i believe you could be defeated with a strategically placed spider >.>
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Haha the quote isn't meant to say who can be most like a volcano. It says you never know who you're dealing with until it's life and death (or something equally extreme). Luckily for both of us we'll never have to find out
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· 5 years ago
I've got like 2 millions shirts. I go through them fast and furious, I dont have time for favourites.
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No point arguing about it, but I honestly dont know who you're kidding. We a go through some shit, life is hard. I wasn't referring to our little Aviva, or Grim, or Catfluff. They have made the grade and earned their tough-cookie cards, esp our little pixie. But most of the people who I witness you gently caressing and reassuring... idk where they're from or how they've made it in the real world, but it's not going to last. It's their own damn faults they're weak and broken, and its only going to get worse as long as they let themselves stay weak and pathetic. Considering my lovely ex literally left me because of my views on the topic, I suggest we move on. But as for an army of these people... I could probably fire 1 bullet into the sky and they'd scatter in fear from the loud noise. Cowards the lot of them.
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Edited 5 years ago
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· 5 years ago
You may have a point with the spider, but I practice what I preach. It would slow me down, but I would master my fear and soldier on.
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And idk about you, but I will almost definitely have to find out at some point in my life. I'm not worried about it- I'll be ready to what needs to be done.
That makes it infinitely harder to spill means on it, then
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I'm honestly not sure who you're talking about tbh but it hardly makes a difference. I'm not actually amassing an army of them haha. I don't want or need an army, that sounds like entirely too much socializing for my tastes. As a side note I actually hate loud noises
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Well I meant we won't have to find out what WE'D do if we were put in that situation collectively. I certainly have no interest in putting you in a situation like that, and, Unless you have some highly nefarious stalking plans in the future, that pretty thoroughly eliminates the possibility of it happening. I'm not sure why you'd want to be in a life-or-death situation tbh
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· 5 years ago
Haha I never thought about that. I suppose it does.
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Everyone hates loud noises, the point was the cowards would run.
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And I have no plans of stalking lol. I’m curious, not criminal or creepy. Yes I suppose it’s unlikely to come down to a death match between us, but I believe we already settled that I’d win because your asthmatic. And I don’t, I’m just saying that if it happens I’ll be ready
What about pants? Do you have a favourite pair of pants?
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You know I don't think I've ever actually heard gunfire without earplugs in. It's supposed to be very bad for your ears, but criminals never seem to wear them for crimes
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The three Cs. I suppose it's good to be prepared at any rate
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· 5 years ago
I do actually! They go with my most expensive suit, and you’re welcome to our beans on them, because they’re impervious to staining. I could pour red wine, or coffee or oil all over them and it slides right off. Pour away.
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Criminals are badasses, they can’t be seen wearing earplugs.
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Lol. The three Cs. Yes mama-bear, I suppose we should teach them to children. It’s ok to be curious, just don’t be criminal or creepy.
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A prime shikharizard example: it’s fine to wonder what her cup size is, just don’t stare, and definitely don’t try and give em a squeeze to check. See! A clear example of how you move up the scale of escalation. Always good to be prepared.
What in the hell are these pants made out of? Cause none of the materials that come to mind sound particularly comfortable
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Haha the criminals i've known aren't badasses. I agree though, having something bright orange sticking out of their ears - would put something of a damper on the whole "I'm a tough guy" shtick
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I mean, the three C's aren't necessarily mutually exclusive. You can mix and match. Curious and creepy. Criminal and curious. Or all three.
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Lol considering how much padding is in most bras these days that could be quite the challenge. And believe me, even just glancing is almost always not subtle haha
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· 5 years ago
Tbh IDK. Mostly cotton, but there's some synthetics in them too. They're super stretchy, but they look and feel like wool.
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It would wouldn't it? And yeah, most criminals are morons, but I want to believe that the whole oceans 11 thing is real
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"Mix and match" wtf is this a buffet a line? Haha
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Who said anything about anything subtle? ;)
Idgaf if they know, its actually better that they do know. It just shouldn't come across as creepy.
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When I was 21 and still at school, I was in a club in kelowna with the boys. And there was this one girl who was an absolute SMOKESHOW. She was kindly (but firmly) warding off guys left and right. And she definitely knew my friends and I were checking her out. So we played rock, paper, scissors- I lost, and the bet was the loser had to go over and say "Hi, I think you're beautiful. Would you be willing to sit on my face so I can eat my way to your heart". We also mandated a minimum 5 second pause before we could tell her it was a dare...
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· 5 years ago
Long story short, I've neve seen someone go from smiling to like, dead silent, eyes wide open, speechless so quick. She started responding when I explained. Turns out she was a sport. She laughed, hugged me, I got a kiss on the cheek to make guys jelly, and a firm rejection. Worth it though.
@Xvarnah Those monsters!! :P lol. Does the nickname come with any favors?
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· 5 years ago
@Aviva if a person IS or FEELS weak, and if they're NOT happy with that feeling, it's their responsibility to fix it. If they dont, and if they remain weak, that's their fault and nobody else's. This world chews up and spits out weak people. It's a universal guarantee that the people who allow themselves to be weak, and REMAIN weak, will be chewed up and spit back out.
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If those same weak people are ok with it, then so be it. But if they're not, they have nobody to blame but themselves. I respect peoples' right to choose, but I'm not sympathetic when they moan and whine about how cruel and difficult the world is. Because it is, and they should know that. Life has a way of teaching all of us that.
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If you're not strong, get strong. Because if life kicks your ass, dont complain. You, the figurative 2nd person, not only let, but asked for that to happen
Also @shikharizard I just realized I never responded to any of this
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I am entirely unconvinced that these pants are made of anything normal if they're that resistant to stains
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Haha we can always dream. I think if criminals were that smart we'd have a lot more problems on our hands
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Well I've certainly seen some curiously creepy people at buffet lines so why not?
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From the perspective of a female who's had a share of glances it pretty much is never subtle, and you usually just have to pretend you didn't see it if it's just very quick
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Why does nothing about this story surprise me? I mean seriously <.< right down to the bizarre bet <.< at least you got a kiss on the cheek for your effort so and that made it worthwhile haha
@Aviva you'd have to ask @shikharizard since I think he was the one who came up with it haha. Maybe slightly less kitten killings?
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· 5 years ago
@Xvarnah-bear pretty great bet huh? Ironically approaching with an "interesting" proposition it was my idea, but I didn't pick the wording. That was a friend of mine >.> <.< >.> <.<
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I also didn't expect to lose, but I was prepared for the possibility. I was also prepared to be slapped. Things went much better than expected ;)
@shikharizard took me a minute to realize you were saying xvarnah-bear and not "bear" like "bear in mind/bear witness/etc"
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That part doesn't surprise me either <.<
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Haha I didn't even consider she might slap you. I guess that's a possibility when approaching a woman that way
@shikharizard What about people who have been abused to the point that they are too incapacitated to help themselves and don‘t even know how to fix things? Also, does my new nickname come with favors?
@xvarnah Is that Shik‘s way of flirting with you?
@aviva everything is @shikharizard 's way of flirting with me. Even the cats
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· 5 years ago
@Aviva even then. At some point we all have to realize that things and people outside of us aren't going to help us or solve our problems. We have to get up and do it ourselves. I'm in that boat rn, and its brutally, viciously difficult. Doesnt change a thing- either I fix me, or I stay broken forever.
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Most people would rather stay broken forever than figure their shit out. They've made their choice.
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And that depends on the favour. Maybe, but no I will not stop being dirty.
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@Xvarnah you think dying animals is flirtation?! You monster... well you're not wrong.
@xvarnah Will you accept his proposal tho?
@shikharizard I get where you‘re coming from. And by “favor“ I meant benefits. And don‘t worry, I‘ve already lost hope in you ever being clean.
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· 5 years ago
@Aviva that depends on what you want Pixie. Spit it out.
@Xvarnah nah, you got in front of it to protect your Pixie. You definitely have no idea how much I’m struggling
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@Aviva she doesn’t like winners. They intimidate her
@shikharizard I haven‘t see any winners around lately. Do you know where they‘ve gone to?
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· 5 years ago
@Aviva You're right, I haven't been around here much lately, and going forward I imagine I'll be around even less.
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And FYI, you haven't seen any winners because you dont know what they look like. The first step little Pixie is to stop trying to make excuses for or justify weak mentalities- ie the explanation I gave above.
@shikharizard I wasn‘t making excuses for and justifying weak mentalities earlier. I was just asking a question lol. I know how winners look. They‘ve got big bellies, big ears, big eyes, big feet, oh and fart very often...oh wait, was that a “dad“ description? I think she‘s 27 or 28. I would‘t mind if she was tons younger. She‘d then be baby momma-bear
@xvarnah I think he said he was 25
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· 5 years ago
@Aviva Very observant Pixie. I am 25. And I think she's 27 or 28 too, but she's too much of a coward to confirm.
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Oh well ;)
I mean you're the one who was so insistent on knowing my age <.< I never volunteered for that. The cowardice is just a bonus
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· 5 years ago
Right, and I have an imposing and nonchalant personality, so for me to be insisting is perfectly normal. Whether you choose to share is certainly up to you, but please don’t say we asked you to be a coward. That’s allll you mama-bear ;)
The first time maybe not, but the times after is all you <.< I can't be held accountable for your personality. <.< my personality is cautious and uninclined-to-share
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(Also from a technical standpoint if you killing cats didn't sway me to give in does that make me less of a coward in general, or more of a cowardly sociopath?)
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· 5 years ago
Over-cautiousness, and the inability to act is a great indicator of cowardice. QED.
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Cowardly sociopath.
Caution and cowardice are not the same thing anymore than bravery and stupidity are the Same >.>
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Not saying I'm not a coward, just that those aren't mutually exclusive terms
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@aviva woof
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· 5 years ago
True enough, but under the circumstances they go hand in hand. I'm not saying you're not a coward either.
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@Aviva that was a great show in a terrible kind of way
@aviva I was born a redhead, so if anyone is taking any souls here it will be me. @grimreaper is gonna have to move over, there's another reaper in town
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· 5 years ago
@Xvarnah HAHAHAHAHAHA. I think the term for what I just did was “roar with laughter”.
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I was trying to be sensitive to your kitten, as in pixie. But I’d love to hear more about your kitten mama-bear. I would love to be sensitive to its delicacies. Did I get that right? Tell me all about it. Born a redhead huh? That’s an image ;)
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See, you do set me up.
@shikharizard lawl I was actually a little surprised you didn't catch it when I "walked away," but I did know what you meant, and I do indeed take full responsibility this time (if you read this, sorry aviva)
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That was not quite where I was expecting the redhead part to go, but rest assured that's not *typically* the way I harvest souls. Not a succubus after all
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· 5 years ago
HAHAHA NOO WAY! Mama-bear made it dirty on her own, on purpose... this is a fateful day indeed.
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You can suck the soul straight out of my... body. Theres a good chance we can even create a brand new soul from scratch.
If that surprises you I feel like you Haven't been paying attention <.<
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Oohhhh no you don't. You're not suckering me into being one of your baby-mama brood
As if. You never make things dirty. And never that explicit- the best we get is a vague and subtle reference, and that doesnt count. Victorian women were racier.
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Well, I mean, you could always "sucker" me in ;)
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@Aviva Unavoidable. I'm like the world soul. I penetrate all things. Except male, and non-human things. I definitely do not penetrate those.
@shikharizard I'll take this statement as exoneration in all the past conversations you've accused me of leading the topic astray <.< and there's nothing wrong with subtlety. Anyone can say something *crude,* after all
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That would certainly put a damper on your elaborate plan to impregnate as many women as possible
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What in heck is the world soul?
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@aviva It's far too late for that
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· 5 years ago
@Xvarnah-bear Exoneration would imply that I, in any way, held you accountable to the dirty things you've said in the past, as if they were a bad thing. Which is odd because we both know I couldn't be more proud. So aside from being a horrific rambler, consider yourself exonerated if that makes you feel better.
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Tbh, I talk a lot about things that I'd love to do, but know I'll never actually get to do. My "plans" are less plans than they are wild fantasies I can only talk about online. I could never have and abandon that many children. Even I'm not that bad.
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The world-sould is the idea that we all exist on the same spiritual wave-length. Tbh I have no idea how to explain it, ask a hippy. For best results ask when said hippy is stoned. I believe in the wave-length part of it to some extent. The rest is just wacko
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@Aviva far too late. Mama-bear has been seduced by the trainwreck that I have portrayed on this website.
@shikharizard well at least I've found one way to make you proud <.<
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Haha I know it's a fantasy. It's not a reality that could be executed without child services getting involved, and I imagine your desire to have your paycheques intact far outweighs your desire to have 500 of your spawn running about <.<
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I don't actually know where to even find a hippie. Maybe walmart?
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· 5 years ago
@Xvarnah hahaha, that’s actually a pretty big deal. You should be proud.
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Nahhhh, fuck child services, and fuck the paycheque. My paycheque will be big enough for 5000 kids, and if I wanted to, I’d meet the mother in court and win. I just don’t want to abandon my Satan-spawn. They deserve better. They deserve personal attention and mentorship from Satan himself - but there isn’t enough of me to go around.
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Try the local yoga studio, or Vegan cafe
@shikharizard I should be proud of how proud I've made you?
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Well the statistics are very much against you in that regard haha. Also I'm not sure the could could survive 5000 of you
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I've been to yoga studios. It's mostly flexible, sweaty women in tight clothing bending into impossible poses
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· 5 years ago
@Xvarnah you should be proud of how proud you’ve made me. Because that’s not easy to do, and I don’t say that lightly
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Right. And the statistics have been against me in everything else I’ve succeeded at. Got this rhythm going that I’m not planning on breaking.
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Why would you do that to me? Excuse me, I just need a few minutes by myself.
@shikharizard I'm exceedingly proud of my ability to make you proud. Not quite sure this is the way I'd have ever expected to, but I'll take it
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Haha I don't think the statistics have ever been up against 5000 women and child-support laws before, but who knows. You may yet flip the entire court system on it's head
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Admittedly I've mostly only been to hot yoga studios, but that's pretty much all I've ever encountered. The occasional guy, but not too many. Shall I take this to mean you're planning on investing in a membership in the near future?
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· 5 years ago
@Xvarnah congrats. Isn’t it everything you’ve ever wanted in life?
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Hopefully I never have to. But if I should, I shall.
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So first you describe heaven, and then you sound like you’re complaining.. I don’t get it..Seriously, that was a compelling description. But no, I shall not be. Yoga doesn’t sound like my thing, but I’ll definitely do my best to buy my next apartment somewhere with a good view.
@shikharizard well there's distinctly less chocolate involved, but outside of that it's right up there
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Haha how did that sound like I was complaining? I was just adding on to what I'd already said. Perhaps there's distinctly more hippies at normal yoga studios than hot yoga studios is all I was saying.
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I'm fairly certain most of the studios don't have windows, so alas, your hopes of seeing several women in down dog or happy baby from the comfort of your own home may have been dashed. Then again, I don't know what your Saturday night looks like. Maybe your office girl has a friend >.>
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· 5 years ago
@Xvarnah I can bring chocolate. You’re welcome.
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I’ll literally pay the studio to put windows in that point towards my windows. Polarized, so only people at exactly my angle can see. I had to google “happy baby” pose - I approve this message.
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Hahaha “my office girl” is not mine yet. Yet.
@shikharizard chocolate and your approval - my life is now complete x)
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Haha well points for determination at any rate. Yes, "Happy Baby" isn't well known by name, but it's fairly infamous for it's approval by male observers. Puppy Pose is quite popular as well. As in "standing straddle forward bend," though it's name is a bit more obvious <.< really, I'm honestly surprised more men aren't into yoga, but I suppose *watching* and actually having to *participate* places two entirely different kinds of strain on certain areas of their bodies
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Well she's yours more than she's anyone else's in this chat haha. Doesn't sound like she'll have too many objections at any rate
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· 5 years ago
@Xvarnah you're welcome.
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Yeah, see the problem with yoga is it's all just watching. I'm literally starting on a diet right now, I'll be dropping like 15lbs in the next 2 months AND putting muscle back on. Then I can consider joining a yoga studio downtown. Best case scenario, I'm the subject of attention and not the other way around, but we'll see. The strain, as you so delicately put it should break me, mentally, not physically. I'm a very tactile person. I need to touch.. and taste, not just see.
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Well get there. First I have to make sure she knows she's chosen a winning horse. Then I need her to know she's privileged for the opportunity- which shouldn't be too hard. She looks young. Then the fun can begin.
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· 5 years ago
P.s. why is this site broken? I'm getting the feeling it'll go for good in a few days and not come back. Reconvene on reddit I suppose
@shikharizard haha I wasn't serious about you taking it up. Most men are more going for strength training anyway, which yoga *CAN* do but typically isn't aimed Howard's. Haha I'm sure being one of the few males in a class would get you attention either way, depending on the environment. Touching and tasting would definitely get you thrown out in fairly short order
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Misread that as "first I have to make sure she knows she's been chosen as the winning horse" and I was trying very hard not to smack my head because saying something like THAT to her would be a surefire way to ensure you never got to ride her, so to speak. Haha you say that like YOU'RE not young or something. Is 25 so geriatric these days?
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I thought that was just for me tbh. It's happened before.. Never this extreme though. I'm hoping it will sort itself out by tomorrow
@aviva shikharizard is taking up yoga and funsubstance is running very poorly today
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· 5 years ago
@Xvarnah touching and tasting may also get me a super kinky date. Maybe getting thrown out would be a blessing. We can go back to my place and finish the workout.
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And yes, if you hadn't noticed. 25 is basically ancient, esp when the girl is like 20 or 21
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Bossman sold me on going full keto. All I ate was meat yday, today I have a splitting headache and I barely made it through cardio.
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@Aviva these are the end times
@xvarnah No! Not yoga!!! Poorly?
@shikharizard In reference to your much earlier comment, does that mean you penetrate animals and kids too?
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· 5 years ago
@Aviva thats why specified that I dont penetrate non-human things. You're right, I didn't say anything about children, but I was under the impression that I was in better company. The kind that wouldn't ask a question like that -_-
@shikharizard You definitley are in better company. We don‘t judge you, and we haven‘t called the cops on you killing cats. We deserve medals. What do you think, @xvarnah ?
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· 5 years ago
@Aviva actually, if you call the cops, call them on @Xvarnah. She’s willing to let cute, fuzzy little kittens die, instead of sharing how old she is. How unimaginably cruel...
@Aviva perhaps you'll understand when you're older, but @Xvarnah loves terrorists. And you're right, there's never any negotiation ;)
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@Catfluff is powerless to stop me- like everyone else. Except for mama-bear of course. She knows what she has to do.
@shikharizard haha it's possible, but is one date really worth giving up the view entirely? <.<
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If she was 18 or 19 maybe but 21 is old enough to drink, shoot a gun, vote, and do all those other things in literally every part of the world, and it's only a 4 year difference age wise. Maturity wise might be a different story, but depends on the person
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Ummmm. I don't think that's how you're supposed to do keto o.o and you're probably much better off easing into it. I know that's not your style, but seriously. Keto can be very beneficial but it is a huge hit to your system, on multiple levels. Not even counting the potential for sugar withdrawal. Plus with your particular metabolism keto is likely going to leave you feeling extremely hungry a large amount of the time. Either way I would definitely be working on incorporating a good deal of fiber (preferably via plant material) and water in your diet the next couple of days or I have a feeling you're going to have a few problems...
... more than just the headache.
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@aviva I have no idea actually. Most guys i've met don't seem to have the flexibility for it, or just are unwilling to try it
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@shikharizard for a second I thought you were attempting to make a joke implying children aren't human. Trying not to be disappointed
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@aviva are there not-calling-the-cops awards? Not the most badass thing I've heard of but I'll take it
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@shikharizard and I like cats better than people
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Out of time respond more later
@catfluff -hands a wooden shield- welcome to the game
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@Aviva I hadn't actually classified him a terrorist yet (though there's still time).
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@shikharizard I can come up with mutliple implications for what I have to do to stop you, but since I'm not sure which you were trying to imply I'll refrain from commenting for now <.<
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· 5 years ago
@Xvarnah-bear one bush in the hand is worth two... wait, I think I got that mixed up ;)
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And anyway, I live in Vancouver. There are more then just 1 or 2 or 15,000 yoga studios. I'll just have go make the rounds
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Lol, I think I'm an authority on girls who appear mature but really aren't. And trust me I'm not proud of that. I'll let you how things unfold.
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Yes, keto might kill me, but what doesnt only makes me stronger. I just realized why my body has been craving the almond milk lattes the espresso machine puts out- 12.5g of sugar per cup. I'll have to switch those out too. This definitely isn't going to be fun. It's not even 4, I probably need to be here until 6 or 7 or later, and I feel like collapsing. It's supposed to get much worse over the next 6-8 days too.
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Babies aren't people.. not yet anyway. Children are little monsters- I was a prime example. But yeah, just to clarify. Absolutely no penetration...
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Edited 5 years ago
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· 5 years ago
...and that's fine. I like animals better than people too, I just need you to like me more than you like most other people ;)
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Hahaha I'd just looooove to hear what you thought I was implying, but to be sensitive to your delicate little kitten again, I'll just say I meant you'd have to share how old you are.
@shikharizard and here I'd think you'd be all about putting the bird in the bushes
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Oh lord I've set you loose on the yoga population at large lmao. Though you realize you do actually have to do SOME of the stretching or they ask you to leave? <.<
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I'm not sure office girl does seem mature tbh but since I'm far from an "authority" I'll leave that to your analysis
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I'm not trying to talk you OUT of keto. It works really well for some people. I just don't think going cold turkey is the best approach. And definitely not meat-only. Sugar can cause actual withdrawal symptoms in a lot of people, not unlike drugs, and the entire diet in general is such a huge shock to the system. One thing to go hard or go home another to cripple your system willingly when you're already dealing with a new job and such. But you're a big boy-- you'll make some sort of decision for yourself >.>
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I definitely wouldn't have thought otherwise. But I agree-- children can be absolute monsters haha
Oh do you now? <.< and why might that be?
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Well I wouldn't have been surprised if my kitten and it's sensitivities had been involved either way. That, or an obscene amount of violence. Maybe both
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· 5 years ago
@Xvarnah gotta have em in hand before you can put the bird in me
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My ocular muscles will be working overtime. Does that count?
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Hahaha, she's so young, she still doesnt know how to check someone out without getting caught. Girls are supposed to be good at that shit. And then when she gets caught she shows her embarrassment. Adorable.
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Too late. I'll let you know if I die. Severe abdominal pains yday, nausea and I expect to get the sugar shakes in the next few days.
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Lol, why might that be? I hit on your relentlessly. Its self-important that you like me at least a little in order for me to ever be able to convince you to make bad decisions.
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I can be as violent as you like- I told ya, I drown kittens regularly. Though I'm glad you appreciate the violence ;)
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I'm not crying, you're crying!
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P.S. good news! The 40 @kittenfluffs I ordered should be here in about 1 hour according to the tracking number, so i can add another 40 to Xvarnah's conscience
A local user of a website came out as anti-cat. She expressed her hate by saying “I believe kittens are killing earth and they need to die.“
In Other News: Famous Gangster, @Shikharizard , Gets Arrested For Animal Assault and Threatening to Kill a Lady.
@Catfluff reported the hurt her people were going through this morning. She said a gangster(popularly known as Shikharizard) left a cat corpse at her door-step every night of last week. She stated how afraid she was for her life. She said: “I‘m afraid for my life.“
That‘s all we have at the moment. Stay tuned for more outrageous stories.
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Can you put the article on a poster for me? I want to hang it on my wall.
@Xvarnah Doesn‘t matter. The news is coated with propaganda nowadays
@shikharizard You means when she poops in her pants, or when she spills beans on your favorite t-shirt?
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Also, how old are you?
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So how old are you?
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Older than I was yesterday
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Which is how old exactly?
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Younger than I'll be by the time this comment posts
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How many years old will you be on your birthday in 2019?
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I had an inclination you might feel that way, although I very much suspect it depends on the person in question
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I had a feeling you might choose to continue being a coward, although, I suppose one cannot expect more from someone who intentionally allows kittens to drown on her account ;)
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Your account is the one drowning them, I'm just a bystander in this <.<
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You are the causation, the culprit, the criminal, the mastermind and the buck stops with you. You should be ashamed of yourself!
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I definitely didn't mastermind anything <.< though if I DID that would have been pretty impressive on my part. Can I be ashamed of myself for different reasons? Does that count?
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I distinctly remember you telling me to drown kittens to coerce the non-dead part of your heart to tell the truth. No you may not be ashamed with yourself for other reasons.. this is the only one!
I'm definitely not prepared for that and yet I'm riveted
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Interesting one of the voices took on the sound of mine in your head somehow <.< and bolder still of you to assume all of my heart isn't dead.
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This opens up a world of new activities, in that case
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Well, seeing as it was your voice, from your body that explained this to me, it corroborates that you are in fact a monster. Also, everyone knows your heart is mostly intact. Constantly trying to protect the babies from corruption, or comfort the million and a half wounded souls who seek solace on this site.
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I'd love to know what activities sweet mama-bear thinks this opens the door for. Can I join?
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Not sure how I feel about my body being in your head but okay <.< I'm to be a monster trying to protect babies and wounded souls, am I?
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Given your trepidation of Rosalinas I'm not sure you'd have the stomach <.<
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Oh it's been in my head for sometime ;)
And apparently so. Self-proclaimed a high likelihood of a completely dead heart, clesrly happy to murder 100s of cats.. yet somehow always willing to nurture every broken bird who somebody was mean to and now they need their mommy.
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Jokes aside, while Rosalinas says some scary shit sometimes, I've called her on it and told her she's not as scary as she pretends to be.
The fact that literally any of you think you COULD be more potentially extreme than I COULD (if i had to) is laughable
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Along with dr_richard_ew 's apparently. And I have not personally murdered any cats <.< I'm pretty sure I haven't nurtured EVERY one. Besides, what better way to build an army of loyal subjects?
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No idea. I've never given much thought to Rosalina tbh. I think we've had a grand total of two interactions of any length with her, one where it was the "broken bird" scenario, and the other ended in her declaring I was a SJW because of nipples.
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I'm not sure it's a competition. <.< I've never tried to be extreme. I'm not sure what would happen if I were ever forced into a situation where I needed to be. How's that quote go? "Hold a man over the edge of a volcano and on that day you will meet the man."
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@Xvarnah SCRUB? ME? Fuck no. I’d literally just throw it away and buy a new one. Nobody has time to scrub. Killing cats has never worried me. I don’t enjoy it, but you force me to. So I may be murderous, but you’re heartless
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Lol. I called doc’s bluff, I have no interest in playing with his bits. Yours on the other hand could be fun, but idk we’ve never met. And as for you and your army - the people in question could be defeated by loud noises and a stiff breeze. Loyal though the weaklings and cowards may be, they could be defeated by a playful puppy.
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Eh, I was just saying she was next closest person.
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If it was a competition, I would win. That goes for virtually any competition. If it came down to between you and me, and who was willing to do something more extreme, you could go off like Krakatoa, but I would split the earth in two by comparison. FYI for the example to make, google the eruption of and aftermath of Kra.
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I'd say some of them are infinitely braver and stronger than you give them credit for <.< particularly our little Aviva. Though lord knows Grim's been through more than enough recently, but I haven't enlisted him as of yet. Still, if they have to fail, at the paws of a puppy is definitely the way to go. Also i believe you could be defeated with a strategically placed spider >.>
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Haha the quote isn't meant to say who can be most like a volcano. It says you never know who you're dealing with until it's life and death (or something equally extreme). Luckily for both of us we'll never have to find out
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No point arguing about it, but I honestly dont know who you're kidding. We a go through some shit, life is hard. I wasn't referring to our little Aviva, or Grim, or Catfluff. They have made the grade and earned their tough-cookie cards, esp our little pixie. But most of the people who I witness you gently caressing and reassuring... idk where they're from or how they've made it in the real world, but it's not going to last. It's their own damn faults they're weak and broken, and its only going to get worse as long as they let themselves stay weak and pathetic. Considering my lovely ex literally left me because of my views on the topic, I suggest we move on. But as for an army of these people... I could probably fire 1 bullet into the sky and they'd scatter in fear from the loud noise. Cowards the lot of them.
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And idk about you, but I will almost definitely have to find out at some point in my life. I'm not worried about it- I'll be ready to what needs to be done.
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I'm honestly not sure who you're talking about tbh but it hardly makes a difference. I'm not actually amassing an army of them haha. I don't want or need an army, that sounds like entirely too much socializing for my tastes. As a side note I actually hate loud noises
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Well I meant we won't have to find out what WE'D do if we were put in that situation collectively. I certainly have no interest in putting you in a situation like that, and, Unless you have some highly nefarious stalking plans in the future, that pretty thoroughly eliminates the possibility of it happening. I'm not sure why you'd want to be in a life-or-death situation tbh
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Everyone hates loud noises, the point was the cowards would run.
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And I have no plans of stalking lol. I’m curious, not criminal or creepy. Yes I suppose it’s unlikely to come down to a death match between us, but I believe we already settled that I’d win because your asthmatic. And I don’t, I’m just saying that if it happens I’ll be ready
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You know I don't think I've ever actually heard gunfire without earplugs in. It's supposed to be very bad for your ears, but criminals never seem to wear them for crimes
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The three Cs. I suppose it's good to be prepared at any rate
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Criminals are badasses, they can’t be seen wearing earplugs.
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Lol. The three Cs. Yes mama-bear, I suppose we should teach them to children. It’s ok to be curious, just don’t be criminal or creepy.
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A prime shikharizard example: it’s fine to wonder what her cup size is, just don’t stare, and definitely don’t try and give em a squeeze to check. See! A clear example of how you move up the scale of escalation. Always good to be prepared.
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Haha the criminals i've known aren't badasses. I agree though, having something bright orange sticking out of their ears - would put something of a damper on the whole "I'm a tough guy" shtick
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I mean, the three C's aren't necessarily mutually exclusive. You can mix and match. Curious and creepy. Criminal and curious. Or all three.
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Lol considering how much padding is in most bras these days that could be quite the challenge. And believe me, even just glancing is almost always not subtle haha
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It would wouldn't it? And yeah, most criminals are morons, but I want to believe that the whole oceans 11 thing is real
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"Mix and match" wtf is this a buffet a line? Haha
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Who said anything about anything subtle? ;)
Idgaf if they know, its actually better that they do know. It just shouldn't come across as creepy.
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When I was 21 and still at school, I was in a club in kelowna with the boys. And there was this one girl who was an absolute SMOKESHOW. She was kindly (but firmly) warding off guys left and right. And she definitely knew my friends and I were checking her out. So we played rock, paper, scissors- I lost, and the bet was the loser had to go over and say "Hi, I think you're beautiful. Would you be willing to sit on my face so I can eat my way to your heart". We also mandated a minimum 5 second pause before we could tell her it was a dare...
@shikharizard When is it a person‘s fault to be weak and pathetic?
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If those same weak people are ok with it, then so be it. But if they're not, they have nobody to blame but themselves. I respect peoples' right to choose, but I'm not sympathetic when they moan and whine about how cruel and difficult the world is. Because it is, and they should know that. Life has a way of teaching all of us that.
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If you're not strong, get strong. Because if life kicks your ass, dont complain. You, the figurative 2nd person, not only let, but asked for that to happen
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I am entirely unconvinced that these pants are made of anything normal if they're that resistant to stains
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Haha we can always dream. I think if criminals were that smart we'd have a lot more problems on our hands
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Well I've certainly seen some curiously creepy people at buffet lines so why not?
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From the perspective of a female who's had a share of glances it pretty much is never subtle, and you usually just have to pretend you didn't see it if it's just very quick
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Why does nothing about this story surprise me? I mean seriously <.< right down to the bizarre bet <.< at least you got a kiss on the cheek for your effort so and that made it worthwhile haha
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I also didn't expect to lose, but I was prepared for the possibility. I was also prepared to be slapped. Things went much better than expected ;)
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That part doesn't surprise me either <.<
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Haha I didn't even consider she might slap you. I guess that's a possibility when approaching a woman that way
@xvarnah Is that Shik‘s way of flirting with you?
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Most people would rather stay broken forever than figure their shit out. They've made their choice.
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And that depends on the favour. Maybe, but no I will not stop being dirty.
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@Xvarnah you think dying animals is flirtation?! You monster... well you're not wrong.
@shikharizard I get where you‘re coming from. And by “favor“ I meant benefits. And don‘t worry, I‘ve already lost hope in you ever being clean.
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@aviva I don't think we're quite at the point of proposing yet
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Also @Xvarnah nice dodge
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Also @shikharizard I told you I'm a ninja
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@Aviva she doesn’t like winners. They intimidate her
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And FYI, you haven't seen any winners because you dont know what they look like. The first step little Pixie is to stop trying to make excuses for or justify weak mentalities- ie the explanation I gave above.
@xvarnah I think he said he was 25
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Oh well ;)
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(Also from a technical standpoint if you killing cats didn't sway me to give in does that make me less of a coward in general, or more of a cowardly sociopath?)
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Cowardly sociopath.
Wait...what‘s going on?
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Not saying I'm not a coward, just that those aren't mutually exclusive terms
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@aviva woof
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@Aviva that was a great show in a terrible kind of way
@shikharizard Wash your hands
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I was trying to be sensitive to your kitten, as in pixie. But I’d love to hear more about your kitten mama-bear. I would love to be sensitive to its delicacies. Did I get that right? Tell me all about it. Born a redhead huh? That’s an image ;)
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See, you do set me up.
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That was not quite where I was expecting the redhead part to go, but rest assured that's not *typically* the way I harvest souls. Not a succubus after all
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You can suck the soul straight out of my... body. Theres a good chance we can even create a brand new soul from scratch.
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Oohhhh no you don't. You're not suckering me into being one of your baby-mama brood
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Well, I mean, you could always "sucker" me in ;)
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@Aviva Unavoidable. I'm like the world soul. I penetrate all things. Except male, and non-human things. I definitely do not penetrate those.
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That would certainly put a damper on your elaborate plan to impregnate as many women as possible
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What in heck is the world soul?
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@aviva It's far too late for that
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Tbh, I talk a lot about things that I'd love to do, but know I'll never actually get to do. My "plans" are less plans than they are wild fantasies I can only talk about online. I could never have and abandon that many children. Even I'm not that bad.
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The world-sould is the idea that we all exist on the same spiritual wave-length. Tbh I have no idea how to explain it, ask a hippy. For best results ask when said hippy is stoned. I believe in the wave-length part of it to some extent. The rest is just wacko
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@Aviva far too late. Mama-bear has been seduced by the trainwreck that I have portrayed on this website.
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Haha I know it's a fantasy. It's not a reality that could be executed without child services getting involved, and I imagine your desire to have your paycheques intact far outweighs your desire to have 500 of your spawn running about <.<
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I don't actually know where to even find a hippie. Maybe walmart?
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Nahhhh, fuck child services, and fuck the paycheque. My paycheque will be big enough for 5000 kids, and if I wanted to, I’d meet the mother in court and win. I just don’t want to abandon my Satan-spawn. They deserve better. They deserve personal attention and mentorship from Satan himself - but there isn’t enough of me to go around.
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Try the local yoga studio, or Vegan cafe
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Well the statistics are very much against you in that regard haha. Also I'm not sure the could could survive 5000 of you
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I've been to yoga studios. It's mostly flexible, sweaty women in tight clothing bending into impossible poses
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Right. And the statistics have been against me in everything else I’ve succeeded at. Got this rhythm going that I’m not planning on breaking.
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Why would you do that to me? Excuse me, I just need a few minutes by myself.
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Haha I don't think the statistics have ever been up against 5000 women and child-support laws before, but who knows. You may yet flip the entire court system on it's head
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Admittedly I've mostly only been to hot yoga studios, but that's pretty much all I've ever encountered. The occasional guy, but not too many. Shall I take this to mean you're planning on investing in a membership in the near future?
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Hopefully I never have to. But if I should, I shall.
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So first you describe heaven, and then you sound like you’re complaining.. I don’t get it..Seriously, that was a compelling description. But no, I shall not be. Yoga doesn’t sound like my thing, but I’ll definitely do my best to buy my next apartment somewhere with a good view.
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Haha how did that sound like I was complaining? I was just adding on to what I'd already said. Perhaps there's distinctly more hippies at normal yoga studios than hot yoga studios is all I was saying.
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I'm fairly certain most of the studios don't have windows, so alas, your hopes of seeing several women in down dog or happy baby from the comfort of your own home may have been dashed. Then again, I don't know what your Saturday night looks like. Maybe your office girl has a friend >.>
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I’ll literally pay the studio to put windows in that point towards my windows. Polarized, so only people at exactly my angle can see. I had to google “happy baby” pose - I approve this message.
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Hahaha “my office girl” is not mine yet. Yet.
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Haha well points for determination at any rate. Yes, "Happy Baby" isn't well known by name, but it's fairly infamous for it's approval by male observers. Puppy Pose is quite popular as well. As in "standing straddle forward bend," though it's name is a bit more obvious <.< really, I'm honestly surprised more men aren't into yoga, but I suppose *watching* and actually having to *participate* places two entirely different kinds of strain on certain areas of their bodies
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Well she's yours more than she's anyone else's in this chat haha. Doesn't sound like she'll have too many objections at any rate
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Yeah, see the problem with yoga is it's all just watching. I'm literally starting on a diet right now, I'll be dropping like 15lbs in the next 2 months AND putting muscle back on. Then I can consider joining a yoga studio downtown. Best case scenario, I'm the subject of attention and not the other way around, but we'll see. The strain, as you so delicately put it should break me, mentally, not physically. I'm a very tactile person. I need to touch.. and taste, not just see.
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Well get there. First I have to make sure she knows she's chosen a winning horse. Then I need her to know she's privileged for the opportunity- which shouldn't be too hard. She looks young. Then the fun can begin.
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Misread that as "first I have to make sure she knows she's been chosen as the winning horse" and I was trying very hard not to smack my head because saying something like THAT to her would be a surefire way to ensure you never got to ride her, so to speak. Haha you say that like YOU'RE not young or something. Is 25 so geriatric these days?
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I thought that was just for me tbh. It's happened before.. Never this extreme though. I'm hoping it will sort itself out by tomorrow
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And yes, if you hadn't noticed. 25 is basically ancient, esp when the girl is like 20 or 21
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Bossman sold me on going full keto. All I ate was meat yday, today I have a splitting headache and I barely made it through cardio.
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@Aviva these are the end times
@shikharizard In reference to your much earlier comment, does that mean you penetrate animals and kids too?
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@Catfluff Who says?! I was coerced. I was basically ordered to do it.
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@Catfluff is powerless to stop me- like everyone else. Except for mama-bear of course. She knows what she has to do.
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If she was 18 or 19 maybe but 21 is old enough to drink, shoot a gun, vote, and do all those other things in literally every part of the world, and it's only a 4 year difference age wise. Maturity wise might be a different story, but depends on the person
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Ummmm. I don't think that's how you're supposed to do keto o.o and you're probably much better off easing into it. I know that's not your style, but seriously. Keto can be very beneficial but it is a huge hit to your system, on multiple levels. Not even counting the potential for sugar withdrawal. Plus with your particular metabolism keto is likely going to leave you feeling extremely hungry a large amount of the time. Either way I would definitely be working on incorporating a good deal of fiber (preferably via plant material) and water in your diet the next couple of days or I have a feeling you're going to have a few problems...
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@aviva I have no idea actually. Most guys i've met don't seem to have the flexibility for it, or just are unwilling to try it
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@shikharizard for a second I thought you were attempting to make a joke implying children aren't human. Trying not to be disappointed
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@aviva are there not-calling-the-cops awards? Not the most badass thing I've heard of but I'll take it
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@shikharizard and I like cats better than people
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Out of time respond more later
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@Aviva I hadn't actually classified him a terrorist yet (though there's still time).
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@shikharizard I can come up with mutliple implications for what I have to do to stop you, but since I'm not sure which you were trying to imply I'll refrain from commenting for now <.<
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And anyway, I live in Vancouver. There are more then just 1 or 2 or 15,000 yoga studios. I'll just have go make the rounds
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Lol, I think I'm an authority on girls who appear mature but really aren't. And trust me I'm not proud of that. I'll let you how things unfold.
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Yes, keto might kill me, but what doesnt only makes me stronger. I just realized why my body has been craving the almond milk lattes the espresso machine puts out- 12.5g of sugar per cup. I'll have to switch those out too. This definitely isn't going to be fun. It's not even 4, I probably need to be here until 6 or 7 or later, and I feel like collapsing. It's supposed to get much worse over the next 6-8 days too.
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Babies aren't people.. not yet anyway. Children are little monsters- I was a prime example. But yeah, just to clarify. Absolutely no penetration...
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Hahaha I'd just looooove to hear what you thought I was implying, but to be sensitive to your delicate little kitten again, I'll just say I meant you'd have to share how old you are.
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Oh lord I've set you loose on the yoga population at large lmao. Though you realize you do actually have to do SOME of the stretching or they ask you to leave? <.<
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I'm not sure office girl does seem mature tbh but since I'm far from an "authority" I'll leave that to your analysis
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I'm not trying to talk you OUT of keto. It works really well for some people. I just don't think going cold turkey is the best approach. And definitely not meat-only. Sugar can cause actual withdrawal symptoms in a lot of people, not unlike drugs, and the entire diet in general is such a huge shock to the system. One thing to go hard or go home another to cripple your system willingly when you're already dealing with a new job and such. But you're a big boy-- you'll make some sort of decision for yourself >.>
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I definitely wouldn't have thought otherwise. But I agree-- children can be absolute monsters haha
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Well I wouldn't have been surprised if my kitten and it's sensitivities had been involved either way. That, or an obscene amount of violence. Maybe both
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My ocular muscles will be working overtime. Does that count?
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Hahaha, she's so young, she still doesnt know how to check someone out without getting caught. Girls are supposed to be good at that shit. And then when she gets caught she shows her embarrassment. Adorable.
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Too late. I'll let you know if I die. Severe abdominal pains yday, nausea and I expect to get the sugar shakes in the next few days.
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Lol, why might that be? I hit on your relentlessly. Its self-important that you like me at least a little in order for me to ever be able to convince you to make bad decisions.
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I can be as violent as you like- I told ya, I drown kittens regularly. Though I'm glad you appreciate the violence ;)
Doesn't matter you scream at the cat, it'll do it again.
Sorry that vase was in your way :(