I was going down the sidewalk beyond pissed and turned to my friends and said "I'm gonna scooch down this alley and make water." I went down a short alley, peed on the wall, then turned around and saw a line of people behind me. I turned back to the wall I just peed on to realize I hadn't gone down an alley, I'd walked into an ATM alcove in the side of a building and soaked the thing and it was dark enough that the people behind me didn't notice yet. I turned back around, said "It's broken!" and walked off hoping nobody would notice they were standing downstream
From 9*gag: "I was so wasted at a club that i kissed everybody ramdomly and slept with someone who was two times older than me. I woke up with a massive hanghover and shame. Plus i didn’t knew where i was so i panicked."
So I don't really drink. Gives me a head ache and I hate the taste. BUT I have plenty of family who do lmfao.
Ok 2nd to youngest brother. Was officially 21 and my 2nd to oldest made him some crown royal and coke. My 2nd to youngest brother drank the first and asked for another. (There was only 1 shot to 1 can soda.) 2nd oldest told him how to make it and said have at it.
About an hour or so later my 2nd to oldest brother CAN'T FIND my 2nd to youngest brother.
He goes outside looking and sees a body laying in the grass by his truck. It is my 2nd to youngest brother. Pants around his ankles shirt off laying in vomit and shit out cold.
Apparently he went outside to puke because he drank not 2 or 3 but 8 crown and coke. He had planned to have his hands on the side of the truck for support while he puked but vomited all over himself and shit him self during the violent vomiting.
He ripped yes ripped off his shirt and tried to pull his pants off but tripped on his belt hit the truck face first and landed in his own waste. Knocking himself out cold.
My 2nd to oldest got him some of his clothes and cleaned him up.
My 2nd youngest brother kept saying he needs to go home. My 2nd oldest brother said AH HELL NO you are NOT going home for Mema (our grandmother who lived with us) to WHOOP my ass for getting you drunk. We are going to Burger King and getting you some greasy ass food than you can go.
Lmao
This is my Mom's story and why she is NEVER allowed to drink in public.
It was her anniversary so my Dad took her out to a nice restaurant/bar a few towns over. Really it was a bar with great food. Anyways my mom who is not a heavy drinker decides fuck it. She's been pregnant for nearly two years straight because she just gave birth to my second oldest brother and my oldest brother and him are only 11 months apart in age. So she decides to get one of the big drinks one of those very fruity umbrella drinks but this one happens to have not one not two but three Coronas in it and 4 shots of tequila. It's meant for two or more people my mom decided she would drink it by herself and by the time the food had barely just came out she was drunk off her ass. The bar just happened to have a live band. And my mom decided the best place to dance is on the table they were eating on and that her clothes were the reason why she had trouble dancing. So she decided to start stripping.
My Dad had to pull her off the table and have 2 other guys help him get her to the car.
Since than every time we go anywhere with her and they ask if she like a real drink every one of us say NO NO SHE WILL NOT!!!
LMFAO
She just giggles and says BUT I WANT TO DANCE!!
lol
For my 2nd oldest brother was when he was working as a bouncer. He would be a bouncer for a bunch of clubs even the gay bars.
So he and his friend Bubba were working at a gay bar and this big guy kept hitting on my brother. My brother told him even though he is extremely flattered he just wasn't my brother's type. The guy said it was ok but insisted to buy him a few rounds. My brother agreed. They talked about bikes, trucks, and both had cb radios. Turns out they talked before. My brother said he was a real cool guy. He kept getting my brother drinks and eventually he was drink off his ass. Some point he ended up on the dance floor. And a slow song came on. My brother is 6'6 big buff bald leather jacket biker guy. The other was bigger taller and cuddling my brother as if he was a child. His friend Bubba had to rescue him before he started bating for the other team. (His words)
My brother said all he could remember is this big beautiful woman nibbling on his ear.
Ok 2nd to youngest brother. Was officially 21 and my 2nd to oldest made him some crown royal and coke. My 2nd to youngest brother drank the first and asked for another. (There was only 1 shot to 1 can soda.) 2nd oldest told him how to make it and said have at it.
About an hour or so later my 2nd to oldest brother CAN'T FIND my 2nd to youngest brother.
He goes outside looking and sees a body laying in the grass by his truck. It is my 2nd to youngest brother. Pants around his ankles shirt off laying in vomit and shit out cold.
Apparently he went outside to puke because he drank not 2 or 3 but 8 crown and coke. He had planned to have his hands on the side of the truck for support while he puked but vomited all over himself and shit him self during the violent vomiting.
My 2nd to oldest got him some of his clothes and cleaned him up.
My 2nd youngest brother kept saying he needs to go home. My 2nd oldest brother said AH HELL NO you are NOT going home for Mema (our grandmother who lived with us) to WHOOP my ass for getting you drunk. We are going to Burger King and getting you some greasy ass food than you can go.
Lmao
It was her anniversary so my Dad took her out to a nice restaurant/bar a few towns over. Really it was a bar with great food. Anyways my mom who is not a heavy drinker decides fuck it. She's been pregnant for nearly two years straight because she just gave birth to my second oldest brother and my oldest brother and him are only 11 months apart in age. So she decides to get one of the big drinks one of those very fruity umbrella drinks but this one happens to have not one not two but three Coronas in it and 4 shots of tequila. It's meant for two or more people my mom decided she would drink it by herself and by the time the food had barely just came out she was drunk off her ass. The bar just happened to have a live band. And my mom decided the best place to dance is on the table they were eating on and that her clothes were the reason why she had trouble dancing. So she decided to start stripping.
Since than every time we go anywhere with her and they ask if she like a real drink every one of us say NO NO SHE WILL NOT!!!
LMFAO
She just giggles and says BUT I WANT TO DANCE!!
lol
So he and his friend Bubba were working at a gay bar and this big guy kept hitting on my brother. My brother told him even though he is extremely flattered he just wasn't my brother's type. The guy said it was ok but insisted to buy him a few rounds. My brother agreed. They talked about bikes, trucks, and both had cb radios. Turns out they talked before. My brother said he was a real cool guy. He kept getting my brother drinks and eventually he was drink off his ass. Some point he ended up on the dance floor. And a slow song came on. My brother is 6'6 big buff bald leather jacket biker guy. The other was bigger taller and cuddling my brother as if he was a child. His friend Bubba had to rescue him before he started bating for the other team. (His words)
My brother said all he could remember is this big beautiful woman nibbling on his ear.
Though he stayed buddy's with the guy. Lol He was even a groomsman in my brothers wedding.