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My favorite debate with the partner- “rude, abrasive, mean, and the best; or nice and not so good.” She’s come around on this one- but her and her coworkers generally prefer people and environments where people are pleasant and happy, get along and cooperate and share and communicate. Most jobs I’ve had- everyone openly hates each other except for one or two people they get along with. You will be belittled and yelled at and argued with and told you and your ideas are crap flat out. But these are some of the best people in the world at what they do. You’ve gotta be good enough at what you do to tell them to fuck off back.

We don’t go out for happy hours together and we try to avoid each other off of work (even at work if possible.) but- we have a shared love of making money and of what we do- and share a desire to make lots of money and be good at what we do. That world doesn’t appeal to her and her friends/coworkers. They get shocked or offended for me hearing about my day or my job.

It’s just another day. I don’t want to be friends with my coworkers. I don’t want to spend a second longer than I must at work or doing work things. I don’t want catered lunches or a room to relax in because you can’t relax. It’s a trap. Do the job and then go home and have a relaxation room there where people aren’t judging how you spend your time or how mentally strong you are (they shouldn’t- but they will.) cry in the car on the way home, eat lunch at your desk or fake business to take 2 good lunch and go relax. When people can’t reach you you tell them you were busy and you look important.

I don’t think all millennials want the floof- but you have the choice. If you apply at google, Facebook whatever- they’ll give you floof and chain you to a desk. They’ll pay someone to wash your clothes and even bang your spouse because you won’t have time. You’re on the clock 24/7 my beautiful “exempt” employee. If you apply at the glass high rise with the robotic desks- or the fun start up ran by 20-30 year olds- you’re going to be paid in alcoholic seltzer’s on the clock and monthly off site meetings to space camp and free membership to a $50” gym. Or go work in a shack with angry killers and worry the vent mold is killing you but get maybe $15-25k more a year and no one will recognize your company band even if they use what you do every day.