Well, I certainly wouldn't want to date the guy after that.
Note: I would have also made it thoroughly clear beforehand to said guy that we aren't a couple, and this isn't a date. We are going out to eat as FRIENDS. At that point the smart thing for him to do would be to back out, and not you know, insist that I go out to eat alone with him.
The problem is most females assume that the guy will pay for them even outside of being in a relationship. I wouldn't pay for a girls food if we were just friends. I dont want to give the opinion of being a weak ass man. Have to establish the dominance from the beginning. I'm not paying for your food until we start dating.
The problem is that most people are users. Not all of them but most. I have had encounters with girls that got upset at me when I didnt pay for their food when they APPROACHED ME for a date. I'm sorry booboo I'm not your personal wallet. My wife didnt get her food paid for until after we started dating because I set the standard. I'll gladly pay for your food if I'm your boyfriend but I'm not one to be used. It has happened to me too many times and I wont allow it.
No, most "feeeemales" (I hate when people use that word to refer to people. Makes them sound like a bitter incel...) don't assume that. It was a thing maybe 20 years ago, nowadays most women and girls assume each person will pay for themselves. Go out and meet some people instead of reading MGTOW forums full of generalizations and lies about women, will ya?
Also, if you're only paying for someone's food in order to fuck them later, then you might as well just buy a prostitute. In my group of friends we treat each other to a meal or coffee all the time. We do it because we're friends, not as some kind of transaction.
And I won't even get into that "weak" vs "dominant" thing. I'll only say that a man who gets upset and petty over not getting what he wants is in my eyes "weaker" than a guy who treats his friends well. A sniveling cockroach of a human who only does good things for people because it'll bring him some benefits as well, same as the golddigger who expects men to pay. (1/2)
Storytime, me and a friend of mine once went to a café to study for an exam. It was just the two of us as nobody in our group of friends had this particular subject we were studying for. The waitress/cashier (?) assumed we were on a date and gave the bill to him. I didn't want to demean him by saying "nooooo we're just friends" so I just shrugged it off, but I paid when we met to study the next time, as it was the only obvious course of action to me. Besides, I hate owing money to people, just a personal quirk I guess. And he wasn't a dick about it and didn't assume I was trying to mooch off of him, just that the waitress had misread the situation. That's usually how relationships work for most people, not in some twisted transactional way. (2/2)
You took my comment out of context and put words in my mouth. Nowhere did I say it was a transaction nor did i say I was looking for sex. My wife and i didnt have sex until we were married. I dont give a shit about having sex but I'm also not going to be a doormat for FEMALES because that's how most of them treat guys. I'm a male and the opposite sex is female. I treat my friends well, if I feel like paying for someone's food I will offer or I will take the bill. Idk what mgtow nor do I really care. My statement is not a generalization because I see it everywhere I go. Passive MALES let women take advantage of them in the hope that they will have sex with them.
I have said it before and will keep saying it. If you are the person asking someone to go out with you than you should pay.
If a guy/girl asks a guy/girl the person who asked should pay. No matter the sex.
And I personally never went on a date and ate more than how much I could afford. I always took cash with me in case I ran into an asshole who would be like pick whatever you want than he is like pay for your own shit.
If you want to go Dutch mention it before you order not after. It’s just makes you look like an ass. If a girl/guy acts like you are on a date but than once you are confronted like in the post change their tune than just be graceful pay and tell them you are paying this time but not again you only pay for dates not friends.
That way they look like an ass for using you but they don’t think of you as an ass. If you did like them they might see you in a different light after that in a good way. Where as if you make them pay they may think this guy/girl is an asshole.
nah unless youre repaying them for something if you go out to eat with someone you pay your own checks be adults, you agreed to go they arent making you go eat food with them
If you ask that is you offering to pay.
Asking someone on a date is hay I like you I want to know you better even spend money to enjoy time with you.
If you are to cheap to pay for your date there is other things to do than eat at a restaurant.
You can go to the park have a picnic. Have dinner at your place.
Go to a museum.
Go to the beach/lake
Or go for a walk
But sorry the person asking needs to pay.
UNLESS said differently in the beginning.
And trust me if you are on a date and you get to really like the person and you asked than you go to pay but only pay your half and than look at them like well you paying yours? You are an asshole.
And if you think a date is going well than when check comes they say no I will pay for mine trust me date did not go well. You blew it.
If they say no I will pay for us that is a sign it is going really well. They like you so much they are willing to pay.
And just because you paid one time doesn’t mean you will pay every time there be timeS where they treat you.
That is what dating is.
Give and take back and forth.
Sometimes I treat my husband to date night some times he to me.
Sometimes I will go out my way to get him a item he will want or love or a snack
And sometimes he do the same.
If you can’t do that your relationships will all be ok where is your half of the rent? I paid water did you pay electric? No you didn’t pay your half of the Internet this month I paid so I changed the password. You want internet pay half.
That isn’t a relationship that is roommates who have sex.
what's the big deal with slitting the check?
and what's with explaining your relationship to waiter/strangers in general?
i've gone to the same place with different people, the people who work there probably think im some kind of whore that's in relationship with so many people at the same same.
who cares!
.
If the person wants to pay for you, invite them out another time and pay or pay them back some other way.
If they want to plit the check, that's fair. if you don't have the money, be forward "hey, im sorry, i was thinking you'd cover for me so i don't bring cash, i'll pay you back later, ok?"
be forward and stop expecting/gessing.
Note: I would have also made it thoroughly clear beforehand to said guy that we aren't a couple, and this isn't a date. We are going out to eat as FRIENDS. At that point the smart thing for him to do would be to back out, and not you know, insist that I go out to eat alone with him.
Also, if you're only paying for someone's food in order to fuck them later, then you might as well just buy a prostitute. In my group of friends we treat each other to a meal or coffee all the time. We do it because we're friends, not as some kind of transaction.
And I won't even get into that "weak" vs "dominant" thing. I'll only say that a man who gets upset and petty over not getting what he wants is in my eyes "weaker" than a guy who treats his friends well. A sniveling cockroach of a human who only does good things for people because it'll bring him some benefits as well, same as the golddigger who expects men to pay. (1/2)
If a guy/girl asks a guy/girl the person who asked should pay. No matter the sex.
And I personally never went on a date and ate more than how much I could afford. I always took cash with me in case I ran into an asshole who would be like pick whatever you want than he is like pay for your own shit.
If you want to go Dutch mention it before you order not after. It’s just makes you look like an ass. If a girl/guy acts like you are on a date but than once you are confronted like in the post change their tune than just be graceful pay and tell them you are paying this time but not again you only pay for dates not friends.
That way they look like an ass for using you but they don’t think of you as an ass. If you did like them they might see you in a different light after that in a good way. Where as if you make them pay they may think this guy/girl is an asshole.
Asking someone on a date is hay I like you I want to know you better even spend money to enjoy time with you.
If you are to cheap to pay for your date there is other things to do than eat at a restaurant.
You can go to the park have a picnic. Have dinner at your place.
Go to a museum.
Go to the beach/lake
Or go for a walk
But sorry the person asking needs to pay.
UNLESS said differently in the beginning.
And trust me if you are on a date and you get to really like the person and you asked than you go to pay but only pay your half and than look at them like well you paying yours? You are an asshole.
And if you think a date is going well than when check comes they say no I will pay for mine trust me date did not go well. You blew it.
If they say no I will pay for us that is a sign it is going really well. They like you so much they are willing to pay.
That is what dating is.
Give and take back and forth.
Sometimes I treat my husband to date night some times he to me.
Sometimes I will go out my way to get him a item he will want or love or a snack
And sometimes he do the same.
If you can’t do that your relationships will all be ok where is your half of the rent? I paid water did you pay electric? No you didn’t pay your half of the Internet this month I paid so I changed the password. You want internet pay half.
That isn’t a relationship that is roommates who have sex.
and what's with explaining your relationship to waiter/strangers in general?
i've gone to the same place with different people, the people who work there probably think im some kind of whore that's in relationship with so many people at the same same.
who cares!
.
If the person wants to pay for you, invite them out another time and pay or pay them back some other way.
If they want to plit the check, that's fair. if you don't have the money, be forward "hey, im sorry, i was thinking you'd cover for me so i don't bring cash, i'll pay you back later, ok?"
be forward and stop expecting/gessing.