Nah. Well- at the least I won’t try to convince you the opposite. There’s a lot to love about the city too- but country life or rural life of small town life etc. isn’t for everyone just like city life or crowded life etc. isn’t for everyone. The country kids growing up were the worst. In the city we had some “bad kids,” they maybe went to juvie for assaults or theft, got in fights, had knives or sometimes guns. We had kids that drank or smoked as young as elementary school, and more in middle and high school. Some recreational drug use. Some fake ID’s and the like in the city. In the country those kids were basically terrorists. My experience was substance usage was more common, and having kept up with both groups- the city kids largely got away from it as they aged while many of the country kids didn’t.
The country kids often had guns and bows and knives. Fights were rarely 1v1 like the city- sure people get jumped in the city- but the country is where I learned that if you fight…
.. a cowboy, it doesn’t matter if you’re in an empty field or the ISS, somehow there’s gonna be a score more cowboys and they’ll all be jumping you. Kids would shoot at cars on the road, play in irrigation canals and do some of the dumbest most reckless things I’ve ever seen. They throw things at power transformers for the explosion out of boredom and if they got their hands on something that made fire, any type of motor, or explosives… you better take cover because what came next was potentially deadly.
My experiences growing up with one foot in both places led me to conclude that I would never raise my kids in the country. And I know it’s not universally true- but my experience many years ago was that the views and overall mindset didn’t favor academia or innovation and dissent. Different was not a comfortable thing to be.
That said- I had a lot of fun doing stupid stuff and I could never ride my bike down the Main Street of my city with a rifle on my back to buy popcorn and .22 ammo at the hardware store, then spend the day shooting cans in the backyard.
In the suburban “city adjacent” areas I’ve had deer and nature and such- but seeing wild deer or feral horses and all the other things, playing in creeks and drinking from mountain streams, being able to drive around at 12 years old and getting a head start on my road skills etc. not practical in the city.
It was quieter- for better and worse. To this day I sometimes miss the sound of busses passing by my house, and moving to suburbia felt lifeless as the country can at times. You get home and you don’t hear your neighbors or smell their food. The sounds of laughter, people having parties, life happening around you.
I guess part of that is mindset. Wether we see other people as nuisances or wether we enjoy that other people are living and working around us. Wether we want to focus entirely on our own little world or be a part of a larger one, and where we draw the line. In the modern city there often isn’t a sense of community. You may see and hear the people around you but often you don’t know them and won’t. In the country you hear and see people less generally, but there is often a closer or deeper interaction and connection.
That’s good and bad. In the city it can be much easier to fade away if you want. “Reinvent yourself” etc. you could shit yourself on a crowded bus and meet every single one of those people later that same week and it would be amazing if even one remembered you were the bus crapper. In the country, such things can follow you forever or much longer than where there are so many people.
By the same token you have better odds that people will remember you and trust you or think of you in smaller populations. This is all general of course- I’ve lived in a major urban area where all my neighbors knew me. They had block parties and people brought you gifts and were thoughtful, and I’ve lived more rural places where people were jerks- so not all cities are cold and not all country is “small town USA home of the happy neighbors…” but I mean- there are some general differences that can be true often, but it’s all about what you want.
So living in the city can also be quite lonely despite all the goings on because you at be watching others lives while feeling left out or stuck. Often times because there are so many people, no random one of these means much or anything to any other on average. Part of why it is so easy to fade away- because people spend a lot of time trying to avoid others and keep to themselves. More people often means more variation in people and you don’t always know how people will react to things you think are common manners or friendly or kind or whatever else. So the city and country both have their own versions of the same concepts. “Live your life and I’ll live mine…” in the country, my experience was people were always in your business. Discussing what you had going on, reporting to parents about their kids- long before cell phones and tracking a country parent often knew where you’d been and what you’d been doing before you even got home.
It’s less common in my experience for city folk to get in your business in that way- but they step on your toes because everyone tends to be trying to get whatever they want done and the concern is usually more on “I’m going to do what I need to do and I trust you’ll take care of you..” so to the same token both lifestyles tend to have their own version of a sort of… isolationism.
As I grew older a lot of the bells and whistles of the city had no appeal or less appeal. It’s also the case that tikes have changed and you can more easily get things and do things in the country that used to require a trip to the city. In many cases though it’s still true, especially if you have certain interests or hobbies, that online shopping or trips to the city are necessary if you want to get certain things or do certain things.
I don’t think the city is this glamorous wonderland of cosmopolitan ideas and opportunity it is often painted as nor are small towns and country living this wholesome utopian peaceful and cozy place of magic.
You kinda have to try things for yourself in life and find what you like. We do tend to on average gravitate to what we know though- if you grew up in the city you will tend to want elements of that and the same for the country. So my convincing otherwise is more just to say- the city may suck for you, or the city may suck for you, right now, but realistically country living is only made possible because cities exist. Without cities those people would have to go somewhere. Unless you’re living like the 1700’s or something you probably rely on the economy and production of cities, and in a larger sense as a nation cities tend to be responsible for much prosperity and security to allow peaceful existence. So I mean… cities aren’t for everyone and they have their bad signs, but that’s true of anywhere.
Yeah I live in a big city and honestly I can't wait to get the fuck out of here. Crowds, noise, trash and graffiti everywhere, expensive bad quality housing, no privacy, bad air, everytime I use public transport there's a drunk/junkie being loud and potentially dangerous... and the benefits don't outweigh the negatives anymore, these days everything I want I can have shipped, and transport between cities is so good that it wouldn't take me more than an extra 15-20 minutes to get to work as opposed to now.
I think I wouldn't go fully rural though, maybe like a smaller city or town.
The country kids often had guns and bows and knives. Fights were rarely 1v1 like the city- sure people get jumped in the city- but the country is where I learned that if you fight…
My experiences growing up with one foot in both places led me to conclude that I would never raise my kids in the country. And I know it’s not universally true- but my experience many years ago was that the views and overall mindset didn’t favor academia or innovation and dissent. Different was not a comfortable thing to be.
In the suburban “city adjacent” areas I’ve had deer and nature and such- but seeing wild deer or feral horses and all the other things, playing in creeks and drinking from mountain streams, being able to drive around at 12 years old and getting a head start on my road skills etc. not practical in the city.
It was quieter- for better and worse. To this day I sometimes miss the sound of busses passing by my house, and moving to suburbia felt lifeless as the country can at times. You get home and you don’t hear your neighbors or smell their food. The sounds of laughter, people having parties, life happening around you.
That’s good and bad. In the city it can be much easier to fade away if you want. “Reinvent yourself” etc. you could shit yourself on a crowded bus and meet every single one of those people later that same week and it would be amazing if even one remembered you were the bus crapper. In the country, such things can follow you forever or much longer than where there are so many people.
I don’t think the city is this glamorous wonderland of cosmopolitan ideas and opportunity it is often painted as nor are small towns and country living this wholesome utopian peaceful and cozy place of magic.
I think I wouldn't go fully rural though, maybe like a smaller city or town.