Lol... Just remember to pay attention to what's going on around you and you'll be fine. Too many people spend their time looking at their phones and not their surroundings...
Things like this, while well meaning, send really conflicting messages. They tell women that if they follow certain "rules," do certain things, they can avoid rape. Not only does this shift the blame and responsibility to the victim, it ignores the fact that a large majority of rape occurs by someone the woman already knows.
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Sexual assault is never the victims fault. Remember no matter what they were wearing, what they were doing, or if/how they fought back- it's never their fault. These type of lists suggest that if the woman would have done something different, she could have avoided attack. That another girl would have been "picked." These are deeply shaming and hurtful ideas that are unhelpful, and only further put responsibility for rape on the victims.
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***This list is my favorite, it circulated around my campus: http://m.funsubstance.com/fun/120979/tips-on-how-to-prevent-sxual-assault/
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Edited 10 years ago
deleted
· 10 years ago
Of course it is not the victim fault. And yeah, you can still get raped/kidnapped/whatever even following safety rules, but they help a lot to prevent things like this.
It's like: With a gun someone may kill you no matter what you do. Yeah, but it's better to try that staying in front of them.
While I wholeheartedly agree with you that assault is NEVER the victim's fault, tips like these can at least help everyone (men too) lower their chances of getting attacked... The ones doing the attacking tend to be cowards, and if they see you are paying attention to what is going on around you, a lot of times they will go for an easier mark. Thus, tips like these to make sure that NO ONE is an easy mark!
I understand what you are saying, but lists like this that place the responsibility for preventing rape on women are not helpful, and not just because they mix urban legend with inaccurate statistics. They put women in the position of being in constant fear, and being utterly responsible for whether or not they get raped. They make people think that not only did the woman fail if she did get raped- because she didn't follow the rules- but also that she also should have known better.
it's not the victim's fault but rapist/murders don't have a conscience. They do not follow rules/laws. They are psycho paths. Everyone (not just women) should always pay attention to their surroundings. And do not live your life in fear but always be prepared.
I carry around several forms of protection because I do realize bad things happen to good people all the time. However, i'll be DAMNED if I'm going down without a fight!
I don't see how giving tips for victims to better protect themselves is in any way "victim blaming" or whatever you want to call it. Its like when kids are young you teach them to look both ways when crossing a road or whatever other vehicle safety tips. That doesn't mean its 100% their fault if they happen to be hit by a car. It just helps protect them so its less likely to happen. The kid that learned to look both ways is a lot less likely to run in front of a car and get hit. Doesn't mean that the kid is going to be at fault if they do get hit anyway.
It's also not placing the responsibility to not get raped/robbed/murdered on the victim. Its giving people the chance to better prepare themselves in case something does happen.
Giving a crappy fake list of crap TO serial killers about how not to rape/murder people and expecting THAT to somehow fix everything because we're no longer "victim blaming" however, is a lot less helpful. Do you really think a serial killer is gonna listen?
....if you Google any of these "helpful facts," you can see that they are urban legends and hugely distorted facts- which all that does is scare women, further frightening them and making them isolate themselves. How is -that- helpful?
I completely agree. lists like this focus on the wrong end of the problem. Lists like this try to teach you to just be smarter then the next person so they're the victim instead of you. Yes, it's good to be aware of your surroundings and not trust those you don't know. But most people are raped by those they know. Our society should be teaching people not to rape, instead of putting the focus and prevention on the shoulders of the victims and potential victims.
Story of what happened to my friend's sister: She was home by herself (about 15 years old) and kept hearing a tapping coming from the basement. She called her parents, but they said it was fine, maybe just the wind, and that they'd be home in a few hours. She kept hearing the sound, and was getting really scared. The sound started up more often, and she decided to call the police because she was afraid and didn't want to leave her bedroom. She described the sound as "metal hitting metal" and asked the police if she should check it out. They said whatever you do DO NOT leave your bedroom. The police soon came, and found a homeless man tapping a knife against the washing machine. Stay safe, kids.
It's three minutes past midnight where I am right now, but I'll be damned if I'm going to be able to sleep now after that terrifying tale. All I can hear now are creaks, clicks and GODDAMN TAPPING O.O
Well it's been while i haven't been online but seems like so many things have changed here! I don't see peble and sparklez anymore or some other guys! And apparntly haters are more than before!
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· 10 years ago
This is getting a bit worse with all the hate. Pebble is like slowly leaving FS. Idk about Sparklez tho, but she is still here :)
When in doubt, act like a psychopath. Act like you have been possessed. No joke. At the right time, the attacker will get freaked out. But don't always do this, especially if the attacker is smart enough to realize it's an act.
If you're about to be raped, poop and pee yourself. Usually the attacker is so disgusted, they will stop what they're doing. Also, for some reason, telling your attacker you're pregnant might get them to let you go. It won't always work, but it has saved some women from getting raped.
Yep, that's the reason I love living in a flat. Eventhough it still creeps me out that I live in ground floor, because sometimes children knock on my window (I live close to two playgrounds) ´д`
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· 10 years ago
This is kind of late, but I thought I would share it anyway. An elbow will most likely not stop an attacker, especially if they are larger than you. One of the best things you can do is to take your thumbs and gouge their eyes out, or use keys if you have them.
I absolutely despise things like this (no offense OP). The best self defense exercise a person can practice is the 40 meter sprint. I don't know how many times I've seen people take a self defense class and think they were invincible, it's false confidence. If you see someone acting shady as hell just get the fuck out of there. Doesn't matter if you look like an idiot or not. Even when I have my gun on me I'd still just run.
Attackers don't always let themselves be seen before an attack, they also don't just stand there, attackers will grab and hit you into submission. Good self-defense classes will stress that you fight back just enough to get away, then run like hell.
true but it is still better than the post telling criminals not to commit crime. this one at least tries to make it so you pay more attention to your surroundings.
You really think.they intended that list to be given to rapists to tell them not to rape? It's social commentary, not meant to be taken literally. Unlike this list, which is meant to be taken literally and is 99% lies, and dangerous http://www.snopes.com/crime/prevent/ninetips.asp
I'll make sure to keep these tips in my mind at all times, but as a women I find it's better to stay indoors always, makeing baked goods and macramé chastity belts.
sadly even carrying a gun wouldn't be very effective, due to the relative speed in witch most people are abducted, or mugged. honestly Tae Kwon Do is better than karate, and there is no space or time for good judo. as a side effect any Tae Kwon Do student at red belt or better can and usually does learn how to combat an enemy with a gun or a knife.
deleted
· 9 years ago
I'm sorry to tell you that if you learn any art of defense a good instructor will tell you the best option in those cases is just run
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Sexual assault is never the victims fault. Remember no matter what they were wearing, what they were doing, or if/how they fought back- it's never their fault. These type of lists suggest that if the woman would have done something different, she could have avoided attack. That another girl would have been "picked." These are deeply shaming and hurtful ideas that are unhelpful, and only further put responsibility for rape on the victims.
°
***This list is my favorite, it circulated around my campus: http://m.funsubstance.com/fun/120979/tips-on-how-to-prevent-sxual-assault/
It's like: With a gun someone may kill you no matter what you do. Yeah, but it's better to try that staying in front of them.
It's also not placing the responsibility to not get raped/robbed/murdered on the victim. Its giving people the chance to better prepare themselves in case something does happen.
Giving a crappy fake list of crap TO serial killers about how not to rape/murder people and expecting THAT to somehow fix everything because we're no longer "victim blaming" however, is a lot less helpful. Do you really think a serial killer is gonna listen?
-Potoo
www.youtube.com/watch?v=5Jx2XTgcIsc
www.youtube.com/watch?v=6D8r-wH0dkk