Student is asked about "hell"; In an exam, this is his answer

Savage

This is the student everyone should strive to be. He got an A+ on this paper, and he got to sleep with Teresa even after she said she wouldn't.

All those words, just to brag about a sexual conquest.
I'm sure I'm not the only one that noticed the lack of an alcohol variable.

This guy. He's on a completely different level of savage

This is literally the funniest thing this site has spat out in a long while now :D

Boss ( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°)

FYI: Back before the Internet, hilarious stories like this circulated as photocopies of photocopies, sometimes faxed in the process. This is a story I first heard (read) in the early 1980s.