Adopting kids of different colour

Culture is the one you grow up in. No one is naturally suited to any given one.its impossible to force small children into other cultures, because there is no OTHER culture.

Blood does not dictate culture. Flesh does not dictate customs.

I know a non-white person who was adopted by a white couple as a baby and growing up they basically had an identity crisis, because we live in a super white area and they always felt ostracized and unaccepting of their own skin color. To the point of mental illness. So in some cases, yeah, maybe if you are going to have a diverse family you should think about the diversity in your community and the possibility of your ethnic child having friends they can relate to.

That's an awful lot of creepily deliberate planning for a child. It's something they can talk to their parents about if it bothers them, and something the parent should keep in mind, but giving a child a home that loves them and cares for them is a better choice that denying them the opportunity.

You think trying to make sure they don't grow up with those kinds of issues is "creepily deliberate"?

It's like raising a child in a completely germ free enviroment. They're gonna have some serious complications if they ever get sick later down the road if evrything they lived in, slept on, ate out of, and crap into is sterile. As old fashioned as it sounds, building character through adversity still stands. If they have no challenges, no outside scenarios to challenge them on how they address issues, you might as well have built a robot instead. Life ain't a free ride, sometimes it hurls you into a ditch and pisses into it. The better people toughed thorugh it and made sure that if it happened again, it would have a different outcome. The rest whine until someone takes pity and scrubs them clean of the mess without learning anything.

That is true.

That's true but a more extreme example. Obviously you can't avoid every possible conflict, especially in school with teenagers. But unfortunately people still stereotype by race and I'm sure growing up would be way easier if you had even just one friend at school who had similar experiences who could empathize with you. I'm not saying they are bad parents, but that's not the type of situation where you say "just deal with it, you'll be stronger in the end" either.

Well there's always a balance. Bullying does build character. People shouldn't get babied all the time. On the other hand, if it goes to far, it can seriously mess you up.

Don't stray too far in either direction, lest you fall into the ditch on either side.