Snowflakes

I'm up for sacrificing if ya want

I volunteer as tribute

I would, but whenever I suggest it, everyone's all "that's illegal" and "that's so 500BC"

I can't bring it up because I am a viable virgin and already made commitments for later.

I would, but I also rather enjoy living. So...

Or do a rain dance and you won't need a sacrifice, (don't do a sun dance because you need to pierce your chest to thongs attached to a pole)

Fine where's the ceremonial dagger... I gotta do everything around here jeez...