Frank, you need to chill out

Harmless my ass that thing is out for blood! And where the fuck is its air holes? It better not be those tiny dots! It probably broke free and said AIR!!!!!!!

How did this even get accepted?

Y'see, there's the problem. Clearly, it was mailed by an Australian immigrant who hadn't adjusted to what pansies the American postal services are.

Poor baby!

aaaand that's how fingers are lost.