Y'all are talking about how this is way creepy but I'm 95% sure it's a joke. Either way it was funny to read and creative. If someone tried it on me I may actually go for it tbh.
Dude was an idiot (as many, many dudes are). Girl needs a man, and a good man at that. She'd never doubt she was loved and adored. Alas, I think I'm too old at 32 for her.
:(