Butt can you do this ?

Yes, I can, just not ass gracefully

No sorry, I've never seen the appeal of butt flossing.

I can't even physically explain how much I don't want to do that

words can not express how glad I am that I can't do that.

My hemorrhoids hurt.

I like your @username

Give yourself an atomic wedgie? Isn't that what bullies are for?

God I hope those are clean panties