MatthewG

matthewg


38, Male, California USA
Currently employed as ER Tech.
Proud father of 2, with a long-distance Boo.

— MatthewG Report User
The pettiness always makes me laugh (so I made a petty meme about it) 17 comments
matthewg · 31 weeks ago
Is your dad a time traveller???
*notices shotgun* UwU 3 comments
matthewg · 31 weeks ago
I don't get it.
Elasmotheriam(Siberian Unicorn) that was extint about 39000 years ago 7 comments
matthewg · 31 weeks ago
Not everything with one corn is a unicorn. *smh*
Church wars 3 comments
matthewg · 31 weeks ago
How in the Heck did this become about rocks???
I've seen people pass out drunk, but how does this happen? 2 comments
matthewg · 31 weeks ago
When you have laser mode puke and are prepared.
Either way, a load explodes 10 comments
matthewg · 31 weeks ago
It's all fun and games until the next American child shoots his classmates.
When pupper has more game than you 6 comments
matthewg · 31 weeks ago
Why use many word, when many word maek FSer uncomportable?
A glitch in the matrix 8 comments
matthewg · 31 weeks ago
I understood that reference.
Something wholesome 8 comments
matthewg · 31 weeks ago
I don't say this often of guests, but....you think correctly.
“Olé” 9 comments
matthewg · 31 weeks ago
"Don't forget to like, comment, and subscribe, for more inane nonsense!"
Love how he’s laughing 2 comments
matthewg · 31 weeks ago
They were inexperienced.
They had to put their heads together in order to blow away the competition.
Not spicy enough for Gordon 2 comments
matthewg · 31 weeks ago
Calm down.
Let people enjoy foods.
This bird tho 3 comments
matthewg · 31 weeks ago
Do you also work in an emergency room?
Niel and feel 4 comments
matthewg · 31 weeks ago
No idea why I'm getting Mr. Bean vibes, but there's definitely here.
Kind of makes you feel bad about it 5 comments
matthewg · 31 weeks ago
Try to picture an adult human who can maneuver an automobile through traffic, but painted lines on the ground baffle them.
good idea 7 comments
matthewg · 31 weeks ago
@kakaburra Mashed potatoreos?
I can think of worse snacks.
What yours? 20 comments
matthewg · 31 weeks ago
Luckily the statute of Eating My Ass is set for 5 seconds, so looks like I get Mars, suckers!
· Edited 31 weeks ago
This terrifies me 3 comments
matthewg · 31 weeks ago
I agree.
God bless the United States military.
Treadmills 8 comments
matthewg · 31 weeks ago
This genuinely makes me sad.
El Arroyo at it again 11 comments
matthewg · 31 weeks ago
That's the reason "unplanned" jokes are funny? They're universally relatable.
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