Had me laugh more than expected

I will stuff you in an egg I got from the kitchen I'm next to.

im evil. i was evil before i knew i was evil

Technically it's not miscellaneaous, it's "kind". Like kind but neither brave nor intelligent. So a polite way to say "dumb as fuck and useless but smiling".

Wasn't it modeled after the archetypes of the four wizards that founded the school? (Idk I didn't read the books)

Miscellaneous??? How dare you insult my House! I shall bake you some Cookies to show you the error of your ways!

Loyal. Hufflepuffs are loyal

Here it is more accurately: courage, cunning, intelligence& creativity, kindness and loyalty

Actually, it's what quality the student values most in themselves. And the qualities are intelligence, ambition, bravery, and kindness. That's why Herminone is a Gryffindor instead of a Ravenclaw. She is clearly more intelligent than brave, but she values the bravery more.

I heard Hufflepuffs are exceptionally good finders...

I’m so Slytherin they considered renaming the house after me