Thanks for tagging me. I've been gone for almost a week trying to put my life in order and get to know what's next for me. I'm so happy you didn't forget me, @xvarnah <3
@jasonmon Heyyy, I'm not dead!
I never forget you, hon. Even if I'm not tagging you. I'm not always great at tagging people, but you've been in my thoughts. Hope things are going a bit better for you
Sheesh, @aviva. I'm glad you're not dead! I've been worried because you said you were sad and then you vanished. I had a really weird dream the night before last that you were in trouble, and I woke up all freaked out.
,
I hope you figured out lots of good stuff over the past several days :) If you need another perspective on things, I'm sure @xvarnah and I can probably help. Don't be a stranger, please!
@xvarnah Aww, I never forget about you too. And that's ok. I can't really tell how things are going with me but I see hope now.
@jasonmon I'm glad you aren't dead either. I was so so down. My mom's twin wants me gone. And I'm 98% sure that she's into witchcraft. She's also trying to break her brothers' marriages and she wants to make sure I don't start university this year but go to my dad. She has turned most relatives against me. Since they don't see her as a liar, none of them even want to know my side of the story. Now, my eldest brother is against me. His being petty cost me a huge opportunity to leave home. All he said was that he was sorry and I should let it go so he won't look bad.
That's really interesting because I was. I'm already planning to pack my bags and run away before next month. What happened in your dream?
.
Thanks so much. I won't :)
And I spoke with my dad on the phone yesterday. I was advised to by the same child rights trying to force me, an 18 year old, to stay at a shelter or with our father so they can possibly escape a lawsuit filed by him. It difficult pushing myself to talking with him, the same man who began my misery. But I told him that I was open to a new start and wouldn't want to keep fighting him. He said that I lied against him and embarrassed him and that I couldn't say what I said in court before God. I told him that before God and man, all the things I said about him are the absolute truth. He got angry and I told him to drop it and that I didn't call to fight with him.
He said I was being disrespectful for saying that I was an adult now and could make my own decisions. He argued that he's my father and that I was still his child. I wasn't even debating that with him. Then he said that I should have in mind that I was going to be a parent one day, and if I'd want my kids to treat me the way I was treating him. I said that I would never treat my kids the way he treated me. He got really triggered/angry and ended the call. My eldest brother had the nerve to say that "it's a small thing and normal to be expected from a father, and every man is like that" It seriously made me wonder if his brain malfunctioned.
I wouldn't trust that social worker as far as I could throw mount Everest. Your father either, for that matter. They both are out for themselves and you can't let them bully you. You have to do what is right for you, whatever that may be. Your dad is clearly delusional and/or a pathological liar, and they build their world on denials.
.
I don't honestly think he has any interest in repairing your relationship. I think he's saving his skin.
.
Look after yourself, hon. And your brothers if possible. But yourself most of all.
.
You said you'de planning on running away.. Do you have any plans on what you're going to do if you do..?
I don't trust them either. I won't let any of them bully me. What I know is best for me is to move away to the university. That's really accurate.
.
I don't believe so either but my eldest brother wants still wants to in back to him because he misses the luxury and he even wants to drag my elder brother along.
.
I will.
.
My uncle(the one responsible for my upkeep) promised me that he won't let anyone throw me out and that he'd take care of the expenses. I guess I'm sorta running away but with his help lol. I'm going to school straight up.
.
Sorry it took of so long to respond. My week got so unexpectedly crazy. And a relative almost beat his wife to death. She doesn't want him to go jail apparently. And my mom's twin told him it was my fault and that I've been telling her bad stuff about him.
It does sound like going to university is the best solution. I think it will be exciting for you. You'll learn and meet new people. I'm glad someone is helping to support that. There are many scholarships and grants and loans that can help as well. I had all of them and worked while in school. Just be careful with loans. It was exhausting, but I enjoyed it. It kept me busy and away for the most part.
Sorry you've had a hectic week. It doesn't sound like your fault at all. Try not to let it get to you. Be safe aviva
@aviva it's alright, it sounds like things have been crazy for you. I am insanely relieved to hear you're going to school and not running away altogether. Your family is filled with horrible people, but I'd be worried sick if you were out on the streets.
.
I think whatever school you go to it may be worthwhile to ask your uncle to come with you to talk with someone and just make them aware of the situation - that your family causes drama etc. Just as a safety net in case one of those sociopaths gets an idea in their head. I also wouldn't tell your family what school you're going to.
.
For your brothers - if that's what they want and they won't listen to you then there's nothing you can do. You can lead a horse to water, can't make it drink. If he'd rather venture back into the desert for whatever he thinks he'll gain from your father, then there's not a lot you can do. At this point looking after yourself is your only priority
asar as I know the wife doesn't have a say necessarily. If the police got involved and suspected abuse they arrest him with or without her consent. But I might have that backward.
.
Your mom's twin is a vindictive, pathetic, vile harlot. There's probably an 8th circle of hell reserved just for her in particular.
It's been 11/12 weeks and I just found this again
@jmmcclain Thank you
@xvarnah Well, we both know how that played out. I've decided I'm not running away unless it's totally required and I have a solid plan.
.
When I do get in school, I wouldn't even bother asking my uncle to explain how dramatic most people in the family are. He may not even want to come along in the first place tho. And also, even when he knows his sisters are extreme drama queens, he wouldn't say it out loud. He just advices me to stay silent in order not to aggravate them more and then come tell him. When I do tell him, it doesn't seem like he does anything about it. I wish I could keep my school a total hush-hush from them but as far as my uncle is involved, he may tell them anyway.
.
That's very true. Turns out there were other scary reasons why they left so it wasn't solely the fact that they wanted something better. I decided that I'm living this year looking after myself first
@xvarnah That uncle was to be arrested for what he did but the family helped keep it a hush-hush and his wife didn't have it in her to take it and the evidence to the police because of well-being of their kids. I did tell her that if things got out of hand, she should get the authorities involved so she doesn't end up like my mom did. She promised she will.
.
Agreed.
@xvarnah@jasonmon Turns out there there is more to my mom's death and my dad didn't actually kill her. A few of my mom's sisters and her mother have a hand in it as well
@aviva if your uncle isn't prepared to back you up then you just have to handle it on your own. This is your life and your opportunity and these sad, pathetic, abusive leeches don't deserve to take it from you. I think it would be worth it to get out in front of it, but that's just my opinion and you have to do what's right for you. Still, I'm glad your uncle is at least prepared to listen to you, even if he's unwilling to stand up for you.
.
I'd try to at least impress upon him how important it is to you that they be kept out of the loop, at the very least in regards to WHAT school you end up going to.
.
Maybe someday in your future your brothers will come around. But in the meantime you can't let them drag you down. Live for yourself, as you said. Once you're okay you can worry about other people. Until then everyone will do what they need to do
.
That wife is brainwashed and terrified or an absolute moron. Staying in an abusive situation is NEVER beneficial to children. All it does is teach them that abuse is what a relationship looks like, and lead to more abusers
.
I'm honestly not surprised to hear these bloodthirsty harpies had something to do with it. Are you okay?
.
The Wholesome will continue until morale improves. I can neither confirm nor deny this being a threat.
*cuddles*
Thank you so much
@jasonmon Heyyy, I'm not dead!
,
I hope you figured out lots of good stuff over the past several days :) If you need another perspective on things, I'm sure @xvarnah and I can probably help. Don't be a stranger, please!
@jasonmon I'm glad you aren't dead either. I was so so down. My mom's twin wants me gone. And I'm 98% sure that she's into witchcraft. She's also trying to break her brothers' marriages and she wants to make sure I don't start university this year but go to my dad. She has turned most relatives against me. Since they don't see her as a liar, none of them even want to know my side of the story. Now, my eldest brother is against me. His being petty cost me a huge opportunity to leave home. All he said was that he was sorry and I should let it go so he won't look bad.
That's really interesting because I was. I'm already planning to pack my bags and run away before next month. What happened in your dream?
.
Thanks so much. I won't :)
.
I don't honestly think he has any interest in repairing your relationship. I think he's saving his skin.
.
Look after yourself, hon. And your brothers if possible. But yourself most of all.
.
You said you'de planning on running away.. Do you have any plans on what you're going to do if you do..?
.
I don't believe so either but my eldest brother wants still wants to in back to him because he misses the luxury and he even wants to drag my elder brother along.
.
I will.
.
My uncle(the one responsible for my upkeep) promised me that he won't let anyone throw me out and that he'd take care of the expenses. I guess I'm sorta running away but with his help lol. I'm going to school straight up.
.
Sorry it took of so long to respond. My week got so unexpectedly crazy. And a relative almost beat his wife to death. She doesn't want him to go jail apparently. And my mom's twin told him it was my fault and that I've been telling her bad stuff about him.
Sorry you've had a hectic week. It doesn't sound like your fault at all. Try not to let it get to you. Be safe aviva
.
I think whatever school you go to it may be worthwhile to ask your uncle to come with you to talk with someone and just make them aware of the situation - that your family causes drama etc. Just as a safety net in case one of those sociopaths gets an idea in their head. I also wouldn't tell your family what school you're going to.
.
For your brothers - if that's what they want and they won't listen to you then there's nothing you can do. You can lead a horse to water, can't make it drink. If he'd rather venture back into the desert for whatever he thinks he'll gain from your father, then there's not a lot you can do. At this point looking after yourself is your only priority
.
Your mom's twin is a vindictive, pathetic, vile harlot. There's probably an 8th circle of hell reserved just for her in particular.
@jmmcclain Thank you
@xvarnah Well, we both know how that played out. I've decided I'm not running away unless it's totally required and I have a solid plan.
.
When I do get in school, I wouldn't even bother asking my uncle to explain how dramatic most people in the family are. He may not even want to come along in the first place tho. And also, even when he knows his sisters are extreme drama queens, he wouldn't say it out loud. He just advices me to stay silent in order not to aggravate them more and then come tell him. When I do tell him, it doesn't seem like he does anything about it. I wish I could keep my school a total hush-hush from them but as far as my uncle is involved, he may tell them anyway.
.
That's very true. Turns out there were other scary reasons why they left so it wasn't solely the fact that they wanted something better. I decided that I'm living this year looking after myself first
.
Agreed.
.
I'd try to at least impress upon him how important it is to you that they be kept out of the loop, at the very least in regards to WHAT school you end up going to.
.
Maybe someday in your future your brothers will come around. But in the meantime you can't let them drag you down. Live for yourself, as you said. Once you're okay you can worry about other people. Until then everyone will do what they need to do
.
.
I'm honestly not surprised to hear these bloodthirsty harpies had something to do with it. Are you okay?