I’m a black girl with only white girl friends. Am I doing this right?
6Reply
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· 5 years ago
They said it in a really stupid way but I think they meant if you're subconsciously only making white friends then there's something wrong with you. Especially if you live in a diverse area...
Maybe. But it comes off very condescending. And I doubt the person would have an issue if things were reversed. People typically have mostly friends of the same race. Asians tend to group together too. But no one is asking them to invite other races in just to be PC.
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· 5 years ago
There's also something wrong with that as well, racism comes in many forms and it's not always in your face, and some people don't even realize what they're doing is racist. I'm Hispanic and I've seen many Latinos just make Latino friends cause they despise other races or are uncomfortable around them and that's kind of fucked up.
There's also nothing wrong with trying to make friends with people of other cultures and making an effort to understand them and get to know them. Shouldn't we all be trying to do that? If we're not doing that doesn't that mean there's something wrong here?
I don't mean they HAVE to make friends that aren't a part of their race for the sake of being PC but it doesn't hurt to self reflect a little.
There's nothing wrong with not actively seeking out people of different cultures to be friends? As long as you're not infringing on those people why should there be any obligation to learn about a culture you may have no interest in? Or befriend someone you don't connect with? Not to mention a lot of people of different races are born in western countries now. They don't necessarily have any connection to whatever culture their ancestors celebrated.
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I have a friend who is Muslim. (Yes, the dreaded "I have a friend, therefore" story-starter)
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Pretty sure if anyone went up to him and implied the reason they were talking to him was "I don't have any brown friends, I wanna learn about Muslims," he'd have given them the biggest "are you retarded" look he could manage. There were quite a few others we worked with that I'm fairly certain would have had a similar response.
Actually he might have "tied them to a tree for a day while everyone who walked by spat on them," since apparently that was how they dealt with people where he was from. That might have just been for stealing, though.
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Me and him are friends based on actually LIKING each other and he's talked to me about his culture based on that. People want to be approached because you're actually interested, Not because it was "gotta catch 'em all, racially motivated friendship day!"
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There's nothing wrong with wanting to learn about other cultures or make friends, but saying people are obligated to, and if they're NOT doing that then they are the problem is not really accurate to me. As long as you're not infringing on peoples' rights or being an asshole, just live your life and let others do the same
I suppose it's asking to be conscious of who you look for friends in. A healthy group of friends will be *roughly* proportional to the population. OP is asking to make sure that you're not subconciously choosing friends based on race.
Aww :)
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I get the feeling this was meant to respond to my other comment, but I appreciate it nonetheless :) (though my other comment was meant more to be a joke)
There's also nothing wrong with trying to make friends with people of other cultures and making an effort to understand them and get to know them. Shouldn't we all be trying to do that? If we're not doing that doesn't that mean there's something wrong here?
I don't mean they HAVE to make friends that aren't a part of their race for the sake of being PC but it doesn't hurt to self reflect a little.
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I have a friend who is Muslim. (Yes, the dreaded "I have a friend, therefore" story-starter)
.
Pretty sure if anyone went up to him and implied the reason they were talking to him was "I don't have any brown friends, I wanna learn about Muslims," he'd have given them the biggest "are you retarded" look he could manage. There were quite a few others we worked with that I'm fairly certain would have had a similar response.
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Me and him are friends based on actually LIKING each other and he's talked to me about his culture based on that. People want to be approached because you're actually interested, Not because it was "gotta catch 'em all, racially motivated friendship day!"
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There's nothing wrong with wanting to learn about other cultures or make friends, but saying people are obligated to, and if they're NOT doing that then they are the problem is not really accurate to me. As long as you're not infringing on peoples' rights or being an asshole, just live your life and let others do the same
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I get the feeling this was meant to respond to my other comment, but I appreciate it nonetheless :) (though my other comment was meant more to be a joke)