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somebodyiknow
· 5 years ago
· FIRST
The ability to create one oxygen molecule 50 miles above the north pole once every 100 years
1
famousone
· 5 years ago
The power generated by creating matter can be harnessed for greater purposes. Also, new matter is pretty wicked on it's own merits.
1
cryoenthusiast
· 5 years ago
But you get to accurately describe that molecule.
1
creativedragonbaby
· 5 years ago
You get innate knowledge of the working of a particle and how they can be created
3
carbonatedwaffles
· 5 years ago
Ability to put yourself $5k in debt every time you sneeze
1
cryoenthusiast
· 5 years ago
But also the ability to put anyone who says bless you to you in the same amount of debt.
2
famousone
· 5 years ago
Your debt eventually ruins the economy by accumulating money that doesn't exist and is owed to nobody, forcing humanity to find new means of measuring value.
3
dr_richard_ew
· 5 years ago
It's me, run away from danger man!
2
happy_frog
· 5 years ago
You can't fool me. We all know your true identity is Captain Hair.
3
dr_richard_ew
· 5 years ago
Foiled again!
mrfahrenheit
· 5 years ago
The ability to control alcohol, but only when completely shit-faced
1
famousone
· 5 years ago
You can sober yourself or a DD up at will. Hell, sober up somebody else before they make a bad choice
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creativedragonbaby
· 5 years ago
The ability to give yourself a nosebleed at will
2
mrfahrenheit
· 5 years ago
Get out of awkward situations free card
3
lucky11
· 5 years ago
The ability to eat one more chip than any other single person that has red hair, attended your high school sophomore English class, and weighs under 120lbs.
1
creativedragonbaby
· 5 years ago
You can constantly challenge them to eating contests and since you’re only beating them by one chip, they keep doing a rematch
2
awake_ash
· 5 years ago
Awkward erections...
1
lucky11
· 5 years ago
Give or have? Cause if it's have then every adolescent boy already has that superpower.
2
creativedragonbaby
· 5 years ago
Immediately embarrass any enemy by making them have a boner. Even works on women, which is horrible
2
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funkmasterrex
· 5 years ago
I think giving my enemy a boner would backfire on me...
1
awake_ash
· 5 years ago
Give awkward erections
1
funkmasterrex
· 5 years ago
in SLJ voice: "YOU BENT DICK MOTHERFUCKER!"
1
mrfahrenheit
· 5 years ago
You can beat any capcha, but only on your second attempt
2
creativedragonbaby
· 5 years ago
For some reason, the govt. uses unique captchas for their security,